Reading of Despair
by 4starfox
Summary: You put a hole in my heart. You made my soul bleed. You caged my mind. I'm broken because of you. Gohan struggles to continue in a situation that seems to be too much for him to handle, but what if Goku came back four years after the Cell games instead of seven? Find out!
1. Chapter 1

Reading of Despair

4starfox

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT in anyway, shape, or form.

Chapter one: Wheel of fortune

It was a cool, late night at the Son residence and all was silent and calm. The humble, dome shaped cottage sat in the middle of the woods, basking in the star light above. However, no matter how calm it seemed on the outside, it most certainly wasn't calm on the inside. Small sniffling sounds could be heard inside the bedroom of eleven year old Son Gohan. Gohan was the child of the former world martial arts champion Son Goku. Recently Gohan, Goku, and the Z fighters all participated in a tournament set up by an evil android by the name of Cell. This tournament was to determine the fate of planet Earth and Goku had fought the monster valiantly only to come to realize that he did not possess the power to defeat him for good.

He withdrew from the fight in order to send his son out to fight Cell and finish him for good. Things took a dramatic change for the worse as Gohan's hidden power surfaced and he began to prolong the fight with Cell. When this happened, Cell came to the conclusion that he was not going to defeat Gohan, so he charged himself up to blow up the entire planet. Just when all hope was lost, Goku stepped in and used his instant transmission to relocate Cell off the planet; the end result being Goku's death on King Kai's planet when Cell detonated. For a moment everyone had thought Cell was finished, but he reappeared in front of them plain as day stronger than ever. In the end, with the help of the Z fighters, Gohan defeated Cell in their huge Kamehameha showdown. Everyone rejoiced as Gohan came out victorious, but they had no idea about the unpredictability of the next situation.

Everyone gathered on top of Kami's look out along with the Dragon balls to wish back all the people Cell had mercilessly killed. However a shocking revelation was made by Goku. Using King Kai's telepathic abilities to communicate with everyone from Otherworld, he clearly stated that he did not want to be wished back; he believed that every enemy they had fought so far was after him. So, he decided that Earth would be safer if he stayed deceased. Gohan was in a state of shock as he tried to reason with Goku, but it was no use; Goku's decision still stayed as he gave a goodbye to his son and his friends. That was two weeks ago.

Gohan often thought about his father's decision at night when he was alone in his room. He had cried himself to sleep for those past two weeks just like his mother, Son Chichi, did. He knew because she fell asleep earlier than he did. However, the silence still upset Gohan the most because to him, it screamed the truth. His emotions ran out of control on the inside like a violent storm at sea. He felt like there was a hole in his heart that throbbed painfully each time he thought of it. Sometimes the pain was almost too much to bare. He turned to lay on his left side on the bed as he let out another heart retching cry in the pillow he was holding to his face.

He couldn't believe his father had done that. The threat was gone, he made sure of that.

"**So why not come back? Not all the adversaries we've faced were looking for him. Some of them we walked into. Sure, Raditz and Doctor Gero were out to get him, but the point is he could've come back. There was no reason to stay gone. Especially since mom and I still need him."** Gohan thought.

Gohan once again let his mind wander in an attempt to ease his pain. Unfortunately, it didn't do him any good. His soul still bled a red, hot pain inside his mind. He didn't know what else he could do since he had already talked to Piccolo earlier that day about this issue. He rolled over in his bed again only to stare at the ceiling once again. Then his thoughts were taken to a friend of his that he had grown very close to over the years. Her name was Jasmine Vencent Redback; a forty-eight year old lycan woman that met him when he was a newborn.

Jasmine was a military woman. She was raised in a filthy ghetto town in the United states over run by crime. She was captured at the age of four from her foster home and taken overseas to fight in a war she knew nothing about. However, she didn't get to come home until she was six. Years later, she met the love of her life Charlie Harrison. Later in their engagement, he was killed in action causing Jasmine to drown her sorrows in alcohol. Her childhood friend David and her new friend Goku, who she had met at the last year of her alcoholism, grew concerned and sent her to rehab. She came out and visited Goku to tell him she cleaned herself up only to see that he was married and had Gohan.

And that is where it all started; she loved the boy like her own child. Of course she loved children in general; due to a combat wound she sustained at the moment of her beloved's death she could no longer bare children of her own. Jasmine hadn't wanted much out of life except to become a mother. Gohan guessed that she had formed a special bond with him because she couldn't have kids of her own. He believed that he somehow filled the void in her empty heart and it made him realize why she loved him so much. One of Jasmine's main talents was straightening out all the craziness in people's personal lives. She was famous among the Z fighters for her "Act like you have some damn sense" speeches.

In fact, that was the reason why people always came to her for advice for personal problems. Rather, if it was marital issues, kids acting up, bad parents, or romance she was the "go to" person for the job. Then the thought hit Gohan like a ton of cinder blocks.

**"That's it! I'll just go see Aunt Jaz tomorrow and ask her for some advice. She always knows what to do!"** Gohan thought as he turned back over on his side.

With his mind made up, he closed his weary eyes and went into a peaceful slumber.

That morning, Gohan had woken up to the smell of breakfast; however, this didn't brighten his gloomy mood. The truth was that he felt like death warmed over; his stomach and chest hurt like hell and he felt weak. For the past week he had felt this way. He didn't think much of it because he thought it was just stress. He crawled out of bed at a snails pace and let out a sleepy and painful groan. His joints and muscles ached something fierce as he made his way to the kitchen.

**"God, I do not feel like eating. I don't want to throw up again!" **Gohan mentally complained as he took his seat at the kitchen table.

Every morning Chichi would have breakfast on the table for Gohan and Goku; normally she'd have to get up early to fix breakfast because of their saiyan appetites. Since Goku was no longer there, she was cooking less which made the dark cloud of depression over her head return. It was Gohan she worried about the most, for he wasn't eating as much as he usually did and he had been vomiting a lot lately. She too, just like Gohan, thought it was depression causing it and kept an eye on him just in case. Then again, his appearance for the past five days concerned her though; it just wasn't like him at all.

His hair was normally neatly groomed, but now it was a frizzy mess on top of his head. He had also been in the same clothes for those five days and, if she wasn't mistaken, he smelt like he hadn't bathed in that time frame either. She worried about him complaining of stomach and chest pains, but dismissed it as depression. She hoped it would all pass as she served his breakfast; watching as he ate with less enthusiasm like he used to. Chichi felt lost, she didn't know what to say to make him feel better. Then an idea popped in her head.

"Hey, Gohan?"

"Yeah mom?" Gohan answered as he finished his small meal.

"I was thinking…How would you feel if I told you I'm letting you graduate early so you can enjoy the rest of your childhood?" Chichi asked, hoping to spark his interest.

At first Gohan was stunned, education was always a big deal to his mother. He couldn't believe his ears when she asked that question. It was like a miracle in his eyes; he always wanted to pick his own future career but he only studied as hard as he did to keep her happy. He decided to seize the moment.

"Really? That'd be great! I would love to!" Gohan exclaimed excitedly.

"The reason I thought of this idea was…" She had paused trying to compose herself.

"What's wrong mom? You look upset." No longer had Gohan asked that question that Chichi began to cry.

"Oh Gohan honey! When I saw you fighting that monster in Baba's crystal ball, it made me realize how much I held you back in life!" She sobbed.

Gohan was puzzled by this new revelation as he decided to probe for more answers.

"What for? I don't get it."

"It's just that... when I saw you fighting, I thought I've held you back so much that what if you died out there like your father. You wouldn't have much to look back on in your life. I never let you be a normal child! You should've been out making friends, and forming new hobbies like other kids do. I didn't let you live; you're supposed to learn about life and experience it, not watching it pass you by. That's why I found an early graduation program for gifted students so you could graduate early in order to enjoy what's left of your childhood before you have adult responsibilities. I'm sorry for sheltering you so much." Chichi rambled on hysterically.

"Mom, I've never held it against you at all. But yes I would love that. Thank you!" Gohan cheered as he rose from his chair and hugged his mom.

Chichi returned the embrace as she cleared her throat and whispered "You're welcome."

Gohan felt hopeless. He didn't know what else to do other than hold and comfort his mother. A hateful thought wormed it's way into his mind.

**"Damn it dad! What the hell is wrong with you? Mom has done nothing but love and take care of you and you abandon her like this?"** As soon as the thought entered his mind it lingered for a moment until the question he wanted to ask his mother appeared into his mind.

"Hey mom?"

"Yes honey?" Chichi sniffled as she wiped her tears away.

"Can I visit Aunt Jaz today? I haven't seen her in a while."

"Sure, but be back before dinner at six okay?" She smiled.

"Okay, thanks mom." Gohan embraced her once again.

"Oh, and one more thing Gohan." Chichi announced.

"Yeah, what is it?" Gohan asked pulling away from her.

"Take a shower and change please? You let yourself go."

"Oh, I guess it has been a while huh? Okay, see you at dinner!" Gohan said after looking down at himself.

So with that in mind, Gohan trotted happily to the bathroom to take his shower.

Once Gohan entered the bathroom, he began stripping out of his pajamas. He then tossed them into the dirty laundry hamper as he caught an image of his naked body in the long mirror tacked up on the inside of the bathroom door. He turned to face his reflection only to see that he, indeed, looked as bad as he felt. His cheeks, eyes, and stomach looked a little sunken in. He noticed that he still had all his muscle tone and definition from training in the hyperbolic time chamber. This didn't cheer him up as he also saw how pale his complexion was. His gaze traveled down to his male parts and he kind of chuckled at a thought that entered his brain.

**"Well, at least my penis still looks normal."** Gohan chuckled as he climbed into the shower to bathe.

He turned the water on and stood in its cascading fall for a few moments. The water's comforting effects didn't last long as another fresh batch of tears fell from his coal black eyes.

**"Why me?"** He thought as he wept in the shower.

Gohan's shower ended longer than expected. He finished combing his hair and left the bathroom. Passing by the living room, he saw his mother as she was sitting on the love seat knitting and watching a popular crochet and knitting show. Then, as he came to the door, he said good bye to his mother and left for Jasmine's house.

**R&R **

**I hope you like Schubskie!**

_Hey guys! I'm Rayvenwolf, a long time friend of 4starfox. She's asked me to look over her story and edit what needs to be edited. If I missed anything or you catch that I edited it wrong, please let me know and I'll fix it ASAP. When I edit these, I'm probably running low on energy, lol :)_


	2. Chapter 2

Reading of dispair

Chapter two: Moon

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

The flight to Jasmine's house was slower than usual. Normally Gohan couldn't wait to get to her house but, his slow flight wasn't the result of hesitation. He just didn't have much strength to fly any faster. His body ached all over with the feeling of an eighty year old man. To be honest Gohan didn't understand why he felt the way he did.

**"I'll just ask Aunt Jaz to check me over before I leave there. After all she was a military physican. That does account for something right?"** He wondered as he watched the scenery pass him by.

The wind ruffled at his clothing as he flew past a sign that read "welcome to Anchor town" on it just before the city limits. Gohan was beginning to regret waring the outfit he picked out. He wore a red, short sleeved, hooded shirt with a pair of white shorts that stopped at his knees. The shirt was thin and form fitting, not offering any warmth from the chilly air in the town up north. He decided to ware a pair of red and white tenis shoes instead of the sandals he picked out earlier. To top it off a pair of white wrist bands clung tightly to his wrists. He had forgotten how cold it gets up north and begain to shiver.

**"Maybe I'll ware pants and a sweater when I fly here next time."** he mentally noted as Jasmine's condo came into view.

Jasmine had a medium sized condo that sat in the center of Acorn avenue. The grass was always trimed neatly and the trees and bushes were always pruned to perfection. She had a mimiture rose garden all around the front portch that had a mosaic walk way that lead to the road. There wasn't much decoration to it but, her home was modest and comfortable. Gohan landed on the portch and knocked three times on the door. He immediately heard foot steps make their way to the door as Jasmine opened it. She looked down to see him standing there and with a cheerful smile she greeted him.

"Hey there buddy, how've you been?" She greated as she let him in her home.

"Okay I guess. I just wanted to visit seeing as you just came home from that mission on planet Yabe last week." Gohan replied as he entered her condo and removed his shoes.

He tossed his shoes in the shoe box next to the front door and sat down on the couch in front of the television set. He made himself comfortable as he always did when he came over for a visit as Jasmine came out with a plate of chocolate chip cookies. She sat them on the coffee table and sat next to Gohan wrapping her arms around him.

"I've missed you so much." She said as she placed an affectionate kiss on his fore head.

Gohan giggled as he returned her hug "Same here Aunt Jaz."

They stayed like that for some time, Gohan hadn't want to let go because he felt secure with her. However, Jasmine stayed like that because she immediately notice that something was wrong with him. His torso felt thinner than usual. And Jasmine was the type of person to know when something was wrong with someone or something. She knew Gohan for his whole life to know when something wasn't right with him. That was when she would probe for answers.

"Gohan, what's wrong? You feel thin, is everything okay?"

Gohan looked at her, shock eveident on his child like face.

**"How does she always know?"** Gohan asked himself.

He decided to just come out and say it sense she was already on to him. When Jasmine found something out about him, there was no sense hiding it. Plus it was kinda the reason why he came up there to visit.

"I...haven't been myself lately." Gohan muttered.

"Yeah I can tell. I knew something was up the moment I saw you. You look awful, you're pale." She stated in a matter a fact like tone of voice.

"I kinda came over to talk to you about something. You probably want to know what happened with the androids sense you weren't here to partake in the battle." Gohan continued.

"Yes I would like to know what happened. After all, the Lycianese Empire Military (LEM) sent me on another assignment while you and everyone else was dealing with that whole mess. Would you believe that mission took me two whole weeks to complete?" Jasmine sighed.

"Alright, I'll fill you in and leave nothing out." He replied.

Gohan had spent the last three and a half hours filling Jasmine in on the androids, the Cell games, and regretfully Goku's choice to stay in otherworld. Jasmine couldn't believe that a situation they all knew about prior to it's happening had spiraled so far out of control. It was like being in a twilight zone. She was then taken back to a flashback of a time shortly before she left for planet Yabe.

_Flashback_

_ Jasmine was in her garden watering her roses when she heard Goku and Gohan land in her front yard. She rose from her kneling possition th greet them as she always did._

_"Hey Jaz!" Goku exclaimed in his usual cheerful demeiner._

_"Hi Aunt Jaz!" Gohan greeted as he walked over to give her a hug just as he always did._

_"Hey you two! How are you?" Jasmine asked._

_"Good we just wanted to stop by to visit." Goku answered._

_Just then Gohan cut in jokingly,"Don't let him fool you Aunt Jaz, dad's in hot water again with mom."_

_"Oh is that right," Jasmine responded,"What'd ya do this time Goku?" She continued in a what did you do tone of voice._

_"Well I kinda tracked mud on the floor as I was coming in from trainning and Chichi had just finished mopping. She got mad at me and told me to go do something while she cleaned up the mess and start dinner." He answered scratching the back of his head like he always did._

_Jasmine sighed as she replied,"Goku, I know you mean well but you have to watch what you're doing. You know she cleans that house on a daily bases."_

_"Yeah I know. But the house always looks perfect. Why don't she just take a break. She does enough cleaning. She can afford a day off." He sighed in defeat._

_"Hey Gohan, why don't you go inside the house and watch TV while I talk to your father? It's a private conversation." Jasmine asked._

_"Okay Aunt Jaz." Gohan smiled as he obediantly walked inside._

_ Once Gohan was out of sight and hearing range she decided to break the ice with Goku. She had recently heard about Goku returning from planet Yardrat and needed to talk to him about his son. Appairently Gohan had came to her house to spend the night after the Nameks summonded their dragon Parunga to wish Goku back to life. Goku was alive and didn't want to come back just yet. This worried Jasmine, for she started to believe that Gohan would end up resenting his father for the choices he made. She came to this conclusion the night Gohan stayed with her. Gohan seemed distant that night after he filled her in on what happened on planet Namek and about Goku. And Gohan is usually never distant when he was at her house._

_She decided to speak._

_"I gotta talk to you about your son Goku."_

_"Huh? What about?" He questioned in confusion. She sounded concerned._

_"Goku, you remember how you didn't want to be brought back home right after the fight with Freeza on Namek?" _

_"Yeah, what about it?" _

_"Well, Gohan had spent the night at my house that night to get me to help him study and, he told me something I thought I'd never hear." She informed._

_By then she had Goku's full attention,"What did he say?" He wondered._

_Jasmine took a deep breath,"He told me that he wish you cared a little more about your family than the planet. He said it's good that your a selfless person in all but, he wishes you wouldn't cut your family out so much and then he started crying." She notified in a voice full of concern and sadness._

_Goku's facial expression changed from a one of confusion to a one of sadness._

_"I, had no idea he felt like that. I should talk to him in private later on tonight after dinner." He decided._

_"Yes, you should. I don't like seeing Gohan upset like that. You know I love that child to death. My point is Goku, you should really keep your family in mind when you make these kinds of choices. Because if you don't, then you might end up digging yourself in a hole and not being able to climb out of it." Jasmine advised._

_"But I'm not digging a hole, and I can fly out if I do." Goku innocently replied._

_Jasmine face palmed. He took another figure of speech out of context, it went completely over his head._

_"No Goku, taht's not what I mean. What I mean is that you have no idea how much that boy idolizes you. It kinda concerns me. Hero worship is so unhealthy. What I'm trying to tell you is if you keep leaving your family out of you decision making for your future then Gohan might end up resenting you for it. I don't what him to start hating you like my sister Artamisia does her biological parents. That isn't healthy on a child, espeaically one his age. Do you understand now?" Jasmine pointed out._

_"Yeah, I do thanks Jaz." He replied._

_"Hey, it's what I do."_

_End of flashback._

Jasmine remembered that conversation all too well. She hoped that Goku would heed her warning, but unfortunatly he didn't. This left her worried about Gohan's state of mind. She looked down at Gohan, his face was starting to redden. Then she knew what was coming next. Jasmine scooped him up in her arms and held him close to her chest. Just then he burst into tears. She held Gohan and rocked him back and forth allowing him to sob in her tank top. Then just as she was about to stroke his hair, she felt something fuzzy wrap around her bicep. Her gaze taveled down to her arm only to see a brown furry tail wrapped securly around it.

Jasmine decided to leave the questioning about the tail alone for a while in order to focus on Gohan's mental instability. She brought her crimson and white, bushy, fox tail up to his and gently twined it with hers in a comforting gesture. She massaged his scalp and sang to him to calm his shaking body and mind. Gohan's body slowly ceased it's trembling as he begain to purr. He loved hearing her sing to him when he was upset. He sighed contently as he focused on listening to her heart beat.

"I hate him for hurting me and mom. I listen to her cry herself to sleep every night. It's not right." He muttered full of sorrow.

Jasmine's heart retched, she was right. And she knew it too. She let out a heartbroken sigh. Gohan had looked up at her, his face still wet with tears.

"What's wrong Aunt Jaz?" He asked concerned.

"Remember that private conversation I had with your father in my front yard a while ago?" She recalled.

"The one where you told me to go into the house? Yeah, why?" Gohan questioned.

"Yes, well I warned your father about this. I knew you'd end up hating him for the choices he made about the future. I've seen it before. That's why I want to tell you that you shouldn't let that hate consume you. If you do, it could ruin your life, your family, and your relationship between you and your father. It's not the best COA. (course of action)" Jasmine advised.

"I know, but I can't help it. It makes me sick, literally." He sighed.

Jasmine continued,"Now, you know I'm not choosing sides here. I'm just letting you know. And I'm guessing Piccolo already knows about this too?" She reasured.

"Yes, he knows. I was afraid that if I told Krillin or Yamcha this they'd hate me and stick up for my father." Gohan informed.

"Well, I guess I fit the bill for this mess huh?" She smile ruffling his hair affectionately.

"Yeah, you did. I gotta get going, mom's expecting me at dinner time and I don't want to make her mad. You know how she is." Gohan chuckled.

"Oh I know sweety, but she loves you. And she doesn't need any more stress." Jasmine stated.

"Exactlly!" He agreed.

He got up out of Jasmine's lap and walked to the door. For some odd reason he felt dizzy right when he stood up, but he brushed it off.

"Thanks Aunt Jaz. I only wish my father was here as much as you, mom, and Piccolo are." He thanked her sadly.

"Hey are you gonna be alrig...

Jasmine stopped in mid sentance as her eyes widened in horror. Gohan had passed completely out and begain to fall to the ground. At this moment, Jasmine was greatful she was as fast as she was or she wouldn't have caught him before he hit the floor.

**Alrighty then! An evil clift hanger!**

**Stay tuned! **

**AN: As some of you might have figured out. These chapters are named after tarot cards. What happens in each chapter is what the card means. Wheel of fourtune means unpredictability and the moon meand unseen trouble. This story is set up to be a tarot card reading. That is the reason of the title. "Reading of dispair"**


	3. Chapter 3

Reading of dispair

Chapter three: Page of swords

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

Gohan laid in Jasmine's arms unconscious and not breathing. Panic and adrenaline shot through her veins faster than lightening as she gently but quickly placed him on the cold tile floor. She lowered her head to listen for a heart beat. Luckily she found one and immediately begain CPR (Cardio pulminary resesitation). Clasping her hands in the correct possition she begain the chest compressions. After five compressions she tilted his head back, pintched his nose shut, and gave him two breaths.

**"Come on Gohan breathe! BREATHE!" **She screamed mentally as she continued on with the procedure.

Every second he remained there not breathing or without a response made her heart and stomach drop to the ground. Jasmine franticially worked to get oxygen in his lungs as his pale face begain to turn a light shade of blue.

**"OH COME ON DAMN IT, BREATHE!" **She cried inside her mind.

Had her mind's walls been made of glass, they would've been trembling at that last mental scream. She looked down at Gohan only to see that he gave no responce. At this rate she wanted to scream and cry in agony but she couldn't afford to, for time was running short. Jasmine worked faster to revive him, so much so that she was losing breath herself and her chest begain to ache with excessive effort. When she bent back down to give Gohan another breath his eyes shot open and he coughed forcefully. He wheezed with each intake of air and was too weak to move from the floor. Jasmine's eyes lit up in an expression of hope as he begain to speak.

"W...what, happened?" Gohan rasped with a wimper.

"Don't move, I'm taking you to the hospital!" Jasmine ordered franticially.

No response was made by Gohan as Jasmine grabbed her keys and wallet. She then came back to pick Gohan up off the floor and opened the door. No sooner did she open the door, she ran outside and kicked it shut with her left foot. She manuvered Gohan to her right arm to lock her door and blasted off into the air.

Jasmine flew at lightening fast speed to get Gohan to the hospital as soon as possible. Every now and again she'd look down at him to check on him to see if he was still conscious. She would encourage him to talk to her to keep him from slipping in an unconscious state again.

"Gohan, talk to me! Talk to me about anything, anything at all! How was your day? What'd you have for breakfast? Or just count! You here me, anything!" Jasmine rambled franticially.

"Aunt...J..Jaz, what...happened?" He rasped trying to find the enough breath to speak.

"You just passed out on my living room floor and stopped breathing right before you tried to leave!" Jasmine exclaimed.

With that much said Jasmine landed in front of the Anchor town hospital emergancy room entrence. She thanked the heavens above that the place wasn't busy and that it was only a twenty minte flight there. Jasmine was also glad that she could fly because driving in the traffic jam in the streets of Anchor town rush hour was brutal. Not only that driving there from Acorn avenue would take at least thrity minutes to an hour. And she did not have that kind of time to kill at all. Just as quick as she landed, she made a dash for the front counter with her face and body full of anxeity. The desk resceptionist looked at her and motioned for her to sit down. Jasmine became impaitent and shouted at her.

"LOOK, I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR REGISTERATION RIGHT NOW! MY NEPHEW JUST PASSED OUT ON MY LIVING ROOM FLOOR AND STOPPED BREATHING AND I HAD TO RESESITATE HIM! HE NEEDS IMMEDIATE MEDICIAL ATTENTION NOW!" She screamed.

"Alright ma'am, I'm paging the ER right now." The resceptionist answered, intimidation very clear in her tone of voice, "Paging Doctor Roebuck, we have an emergancy patient in need of immedate care." She announced over the ER loud speaker.

Jasmine craddled Gohan close to her chest. She was greatful to see Gohan still awake looking at her through half closed eyes and breathing shakily. Her heart was beating erraticlly from the CPR, the flight there, and the previous yelling at the resceptionist. This wasn't good for her heart condition, but at that moment she didn't care. It was all about Gohan. Suddenly, the double doors burst open to reveal a medic team with a gourney as they haistfully made thier way to her. Doctor Roebuck which Jasmine had known all to well from her previous visits to the ER ran up to her with his arms stretched out. She then placed Gohan gently in the doctors arms as he loaded him on the gourney to take him back to a bed in the ER. Jasmine fallowed close by to stay with Gohan. And if she wasn't seeing things he looked a little frightened.

After the med team got Gohan to a bed the resceptionist came to get Jasmine to register Gohan. Jasmine was still shaky and full of fright for Gohan's sake. The terror she displaied made the resceptionist question mentally rather Jasmine was the boy's mother or aunt. For she wore the same type of anxiety that a scared mother would for her ill or injured child. Once she was at the registration desk the resceptionist begain the questionaire. She pulled out a pen and information sheets for Jasmine to fill out. Jasmine wasted no time at all filling out the paper work so she could get back there with him. She then handed the woman the documents and she proceded to read through them.

"Hmmm, okay so you are is aunt?" She asked.

"Yes, I'm going to call his mother when you're done with me." Jasmine replied still a little shaken up.

"Okay ma'am, we're all done. He's in bed five." She informed gently.

"Oh please don't call me ma'am I feel old. And sorry I yelled at you." Jasmine apologized.

"Oh, I'm sorry honey. And it's okay. I have plenty of screaming moms with sick children in here all the time." She smiled as she lead Jasmine back to bed five.

Once she was back at bed five the resceptionist placed a thin, plastic band with Gohan's birth date, name, and age around his wrist as Doctor Roebuck came in with a clipboard in hand. Jasmine sat in the empty chair in the corner of the room holding Gohan's left hand. Gohan weakly tried to reach up as if he were searching for someone.

"Aunt...Jaz, Aunt Jaz. Where are you?" He cried as the pain in his chest and stomach tore mercilessly though his adolesent body.

"I'm right here. I'm not going anyware." She reasured as she rubbed his arm in a comforting jesture.

Doctor Roebuck placed his clipboard on the small end table and begain examining Gohan. However, Gohan felt pain each time someone touched him in his torso. Roebuck stopped and poked his head out of the curtain and motioned for a nurse to come to him.

"I want you to get blood work done on him immediatelly. And I want the results back stat."

"Yes, right away Doctor." The nurse replied as she left for the blood work kit.

"We're going to do some blood work on him. Some of his symptoms concern me." Doctor Roebuck informed.

"Alright, but I need to make a phone call to his mother." Jasmine replied.

"Okay, I'll let you know when the nurse come back to draw his blood. You know how kids hate having their blood drawn."

"Okay, thanks Doctor." Jasmine said as she pulled her cell phone out of her pants pocket.

She immediately scrolled down to Goku in her contacts list and pressed talk. No sooner did the phone ring once Chichi picked up the phone.

"Jasmine? Where is Gohan? He was supose to be home an hour ago?" She spazed.

"No time for that Chichi. We're at Anchor town hospital in the ER. Gohan collapsed at my front door as he was leaving to go home and I had to bring him in. Hop on the nimbus cloud and be here now!" Jasmine informed the screatching mother.

Once Chichi hung up, Jasmine went through her contacts again to call Krillin, Yamcha, and Bulma. She assumed Bulma would push Vegeta into coming and Krillin would tell Piccolo as well. She never could get a hold of Teinshinhan and Chouzu because they had no adress or telephone for that matter. Once the telephone calls were made she put her phone away and saw the nurse come in with the blood work kit in tow. She put the carrier on the end table and pulled out the nessary supplies to draw Gohan's blood.

"Gohan?" Jasmine called out to him.

"Hmmm?" He answered in a weakly.

"The nurse is here to draw your blood okay?" Jasmine informed.

"O...kay." He mumbled holding out his arm.

"At least your not like your pitiful thrid class idiot father brat!"

Jasmine turned around to see Vegeta and Bulma standing in the curtain.

"Oh Vegeta behave! This is a hospital for god's sake!" Bulma complained as she gently smaked his arm.

"I'll say what I want woman!" Vegeta snapped back.

Just then Chichi Came in and rushed to Gohan's side. She grabbed Gohan's right hand and sobbed.

"Oh, my poor baby!"

Gohan slowly opened his eyes to see his mother weapping by his side.

"M...mom? When'd...you get here?" Gohan weakly whispered.

"Oh, it's going to be okay. Mommy's here." She reasured as she gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

"Jasmine, Yamcha and Piccolo just arrived." Bulma informed.

"Good, what about Krillin?" She asked.

"Right here. And I managed to get Tein and Chouzu to come too. They're out in the lobby with Olong, Purar, and Master Roshi." Krillin stated as he came in.

"Wonderful. Thank you guys." Jasmine replied.

"Hey, you know we're always here for Gohan." Bulma interjected.

Once the nurse finished drawing Gohan's blood she took it back to the lab for testing. Everyone else was in the lobby waiting anxiously for the test results. Only Jasmine and Chichi were in the room with Gohan keeping a watchful eye on him as he fell in and out of sleep. Finally at eight forty five Doctor Roebuck reentered the room with his clipboard in hand.

Chichi turned on the water works again as she asked shakily,"How is he Doctor? What's wrong with my little boy?"

Roebuck gave a sigh as he answered,"Well, Mrs. Son we found that his blood cell count is dangerously low. And theres some bleeding coming from the stomach. I need to preform a MRI on him to see why is stomach is bleeding in an abnormal way. It may explain why his blood cell count is so low."

Chichi cried harder only to have Jasmine pull her into a comforting embrace.

She looked up at him and replied," Do what you have to do Doctor. Here Chichi, stay with Gohan and I'll inform everyone else."

By the time the nurse wheeled Gohan back to the MRI room Jasmine had already informed the Z fighters on his current statis. Everyone was in shock as they couldn't comprehend why Gohan could have gotten so ill so quickly. Seconds felt like hours as everyone was waiting once again for more test results. Then Doctor Roebuck reentered and gave a startling revilation.

"We have the MRI results and they don't look good at all."

"How so?" Bulma asked.

Doctor Roebuck replied,"Gohan has pylups in the inner lining of his stomach. We need to preform surgery on him to remove them and do a byopsy."

At this moment Chichi had fainted and the rest of the group was in total shock as well as a loss for words. No one knew what to say or how to respond to that. So many thoughts ran through Jasmine's head as she connected the dots to a possible conclusion. She was a doctor herself as well as a solider. She knew what pylups ment.

**"Oh god no! Please don't let it be what I think it is!"** She mentally spazed with an expression full of horror.

At this time at nine fifteen Gohan was preped for surgery and Roebuck let everyone see him off before he disappeared into the white abyss known as the surgical room. Of course he was out of it for he was already given propaval before the anasthesiologist came in to put him out for surgery. Once he was out like a light on the gourney everyone watched the med team wheel him back into surgery with mixed emotions evident on their faces. Piccolo who was normally calm and detatched wore a look of worry and concern. They all returned from the lobby to wait in suspense just like before. The tension in the air was so thick not even a knife could cut it. You'd need a chain saw to even scratch it.

The coco clock in the lobby chimed midnight as the little birdy popped out and begain to chirp. Of course Vegeta was getting agervatited with all the waiting so he blasted the chirpping bird with a weak energy blast.

"Vegeta!" Bulma yelled annoyed.

"What woman!" Vegeta snapped in agitation.

"Stop doing that! It's bad enough I had to pay for the last load of public property you distroyed. I can't take you anywhere!" She retorted.

"The damn thing was getting on my last nerve. And I only woke up with one left!"

Jasmine looked over at them,"Jesus Vegeta, will you for once act like you got some damn sense? You're a grow ass man! Act your age not your boot size, shit!"

"Shut up woman! I hear enough bitching from this woman right here. I don't need you in my ear or on my ass for that matter!" Vegeta snapped back.

"Kiss my ass, space monkey!" Jasmine shot back.

"What was that?" He yelled back.

"You heard me prince of all trolls!" Jasmine came back aggressively.

"Cool it you guys! This is no time to start a fight." Piccolo cut in.

"Did anyone ask for your two sense namek?"

"Piccolo is right guys. We came here to suport Gohan not turn this place into a fighting tournament." Yamcha stated.

"Right so hush Vegeta!" Bulma ordered.

Vegeta's patients was running thin as he shut up anyway with a loud growl. Finally without further a do, Doctor Roebuck walked back in still in his surgery scrubs and informed the Z fighters on Gohan's statis.

"Doctor, what did you find?" Chichi asked trembling saddness eviedent in her voice.

"The removal of the pylups was succsesful and I have the test results of the byopsy right here. Gohan is in recovery right now if anyone wants to go see him he's in room twenty two." He anounced.

"Alright, what about his condition?" Jasmine asked terrified about the results.

"Well, I regret to inform you that Gohan has a very rear type of stomach cancer called Calife. ( cal . if) This type of cancer is only found in lycian children his age and is the result of extreme emotional or mental stress. The stress causes the pylups to form on the inside or outside of the stomach and can cause frequent vomiting, mood swings, weakness all over the body, pain in the joints, chest, and stomach, decreaced appitite, wieght loss, and frequent urges to urianate. He may also expireance dizzy spells upon standing, low blood cell count, and fatigue. I'm calling in a cancer specialist to get him started on a round of kemotherapy." Roebuck stated in saddness.

Everyone in the room had mixed emotions. Chichi yet again fainted alone with Purar, Bulma burst into tears, Piccolo was too shell shocked to even say anything along with the rest of the group.

Olong interjected,"Wait doc, Gohan's half saiyan."

"How in the hell can the brat have a lycian cancer?" Vegeta cut in.

Jasmine was quick to answer,"Saiyan and lycian phyciology is damn near identical. I've heard of this cancer before. It can affect saiyans as well. However it's more common for them to get it when they're much older."

No one said anything for at least ten minutes. The doctor took it as a que to leave them in peace to come to terms with what he just anounced. At twelve thirty two Chichi were the only ones left in the room. Chichi was sitting in the chair on the right side of the bed holding Gohan's hand with her head on the bed sound asleep at twelve fifty. Jasmine was sitting in the chair on the left side of the bed holding his other hand. Piccolo was standing at the end of the bed watching over Gohan intensely.

Jasmine looked at the awful sight before her. Gohan had a breathing tube inserted down his throat and a heart monitor on his chest. There was an IV in his right arm and he was peacefully asleep. Even though Jasmine swore she'd never cry again, a few tears made their way down her emerald green eyes. She felt like a piece of her soul just died. And she hadn't felt like that sense her feincee Charlie had passed and then later four years ago her childhood friend David. It had been a long night and it lead her to think, for she believed Chichi was thinking the samething she was.

**"Goku, your son needs you. Why'd you choose to stay gone?" **

**There a little longer than expected!**

**AN: Page of swords means an upsetting message.**

**Hope this answered you question Son Gokyu! **

**Till next time and thank you to**

**Son Gokyu and Schubkie for reviewing:)**

**BTW: CALIFE is a cancer I made up for this story. It isn't real. It's something lycian children under extreme mental and emotional stress get. Saiyans can have it too just not as common as lycians and tend to get it when they're way older. **


	4. Chapter 4

Reading of dispair

Chapter four: Eight of swords

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

After that long tiring night in the Anchor town hospital everyone had gone home except Piccolo, Jasmine, and Chichi. The three were constaintly at his side, keeping watch in case anything happened. Jasmine had volunteered to be the one to notify everyone else via cell phone if she heard anything new on Gohan's condition. However, at two in the morning nothing new about the current situation had arisen. It was painful for the three of them to sit there and watch Gohan in the state he was in. Chichi cried on and off, Piccolo was at a loss for words and Jasmine was going in and out of flashbacks from when she was an on field medic. Jasmine was one of those parachute military physcians that would halo jump from the planes and on the front lines of the battle field to tend to wounded soldiers.

However, this was when she was in the marrines. In a time before she became a commanding officer of the special black ops unit. She lived in the states before she learned what and who she really was. Like Goku she never knew about her haritage untill later in life when she met her mentor Erica Johnson. Erica trained her in the lycian military and she became the commander of the entire lycian army. Right now the lycian army was in stand by because of the war they were currently fighting. The truth was, Jasmine could get called in to action at any moment the King and Queen needed her. This worried her, she hoped they wouldn't need her so soon after the mission she completed on planet Yabe.

But what terrified her the most about that war is the fact that there were rumors going on about a terrorist group known as the Mistresshood developing a new type of chemical weapon. This weapon was said to contain a new type of nerve gas called C-37. A type of gas that would kill any being with one breath of it before they hit the ground. Jasmine believed they developed it because they found out about the abilities of Goku and the other Z fighters. However, they were just rumors. But that was the whole reason for putting the lycian army on stand by for further investigation. This irritated Jasmine to know end. She hated sitting around doing nothing, and if she knew the Mistresshood as well as she did then the rumors about the C-37 might be true.

She decided to leave the thoughts of the universal war aside for now and focus on Gohan. Jasmine wouldn't worry about the war untill she was called back into action. Every now and again Gohan would shift in the bed to try and get comfortable. Only, hospital beds were never very comfortable anyhow. Jasmine knew this because shortly before the androids showed up like Trunks said they would she suffered a massive heart attack and was hospitalized for a whole weak. This didn't stop her anyway, to her this was only the fifth heart attack she had in her entire forty eight years of life. Gohan was the one to find her on the living room floor in her home face down and took her to the hospital.

Jasmine smirked at the thought.

**"Well, the dept has been paid. We're even now kid." **Jasmine thought while rubbing his arm.

As she was deep in thought a knock sounded at the door. Piccolo who was standing in the corner of the room opened the door to let Doctor Roebuck in. He stepped in and walked up towards the bed. Chichi looked up at him ready to start bumbarding him with questions until he broke the silence in the room.

"Mrs. Son, I just finished the phone call with the cancer specialist Doctor Reich. He faxed these papers to me for you to fill out regarding your son's treatment. The packet on the bottom of these papers is yours to keep. It's to tell you the things Gohan can and can't do, what is expected, and what to do if something goes wrong. Go over it and stay up to date on this. During each appointment he has we will give you more informational paper work for you to stay updated on his condition." He informed handing her the paper work.

"Okay, I'll start that now. Is there anything else we need to know?" Chichi asked hoping there wasn't.

Roebuck continued,"Yes, he will have to stay here for further observation just to make sure his recovery is going as planed. He will get to come home a day from now on wensday."

"Okay, will you call us in if anything new comes up?" Jasmine asked.

"Yes, and as for you Ms. Redback. You need to start taking better care of you heart. I noticed you haven't been in lately for any of your appointments!" Roebuck lectured.

"Damn! I'm sorry I got deported again for another mission. I'll just reschedual." She explained.

"I would hope so. You know you were born with a bad heart you need to keep that in check or the next corinary you have could kill you. And stop all that smoking that isn't helping it either!" Roebuck continued his lecture.

"I don't smoke that much any more. I've cut back from a pack a day to five cigarettes a day." She defended.

"Good now keep going til you quit completely." Roebuck contiuned.

Doctor Roebuck waited patiently for Chichi to finish the paper work. She finished it and had the date and time for Gohan's first kemo treatment appointment. When the doctor had the paper work he signed it and left the room. After a while of silence Piccolo broke the tension.

"What do you plan to do about the situation Jasmine?" He asked concerned.

"I'm going to the main desk to get the visitaion schedual and to give them my number in case I need to be here for Gohan." Jasmine stated.

"That's probably a good idea sense you live closer to the hospital. You could be here a lot faster than us." Chichi added.

"So, you want me to stay at my house tonight? Because I don't want to leave you alone in you condition. Grief does crazy shit to people." Jasmine suggested.

"Then have her stay at your house and I can help her bring her stuff over." Piccolo suggested.

"That's an even better idea. Let's do that. What do you think Chichi?" Jasmine asked looking in her direction.

"Yes, I'm going to pack right when I get home and come over." Chichi informed.

Just then the trio heard moaning coming from the bed. They turned around to see Gohan grabbing at the breathing tube trying to pull it out. His chest was rising and falling rapidly as if he was hyperventalating. Tears made their way down his face and his eye brows were furrowed in an expression of pain. Chichi and Jasmine ran to his side to hold him down right after Piccolo pressed the call nurse button.

"Gohan! Gohan, listen to me. It's alright. The nurse is coming to take the breathing tube out. Calm down." Chichi reasured him as she stroked his hair.

Gohan finally calmed down as the nurse entered the room. The nurse walked over to the side of the bed and gently removed the tube from his throat and replaced it with an oxygen mask instead. He calmed down considerably when the tube was removed. It was beginning to cause him discomfort. Jasmine covered him back up and stuck his tail back under the blanket in order to tuck him back in. Chichi's eyes widened when she saw that Gohan's tail grew back.

"Uh, Jasmine?" Chichi asked, immedeately grabbing Jasmine's attention.

"Yeah hon?" Jasmine answered.

"When'd Gohan's tail grow back?" She asked.

"I'm not entirely sure. I noticed it when he came to visit. He didn't have it before he left for my place this morning?" Jasmine wondered.

"No he didn't, either that or he was hiding it from me." Chichi answered.

"Well, we better tell Gohan what's going on before we leave so he doesn't fall back to sleep and wake up wondering where everyone went." Piccolo suggested.

"Alright. Hey Gohan honey." Jasmine whispered.

"Hmmm?" He weakly moaned as a reply.

"The hospital is keeping you for observation until wensday. We're going home and we will call you regularly so you don't feel alone okay? Your mother is staying at my place until then just in case you need anything." Jasmine informed.

"O...kay. Hey...mom?" He answered in a weak whisper.

"Yes, honey?"

"What's wrong with me?" Gohan wondered.

"Well..., she struggled for a moment until Jasmine placed a suportive hand on her shoulder,"Honey you have a rear type of stomach cancer called calife. It's caused by extreme mental or emotional stress."

"W...what? Oh, damn!" he whispered.

Normally Chichi wouldv'e told him to watch his language but, sense he wasn't all there she decided to let it slide for now. After Piccolo filled Gohan in on his condition Chichi and Jasmine kissed him good bye and Piccolo even thought he wasn't the hugging type hugged Gohan good bye before they left the hospital.

Once Jasmine and Piccolo arrived at the Son house hold they immediately begain helping Chichi pack what she wanted to bring to Jasmine's house. Chichi looked over at all the food that had gone to waste in the kitchen. Apparently she had just finished cooking when she noticed Gohan was an hour late coming home and recived that phone call from Jasmine. Jasmine then noticed Chichi looking in the kitchen as she was packing her knitting supplies.

"What's wrong Chi?"

Chichi sighed," I went to all the trouble of cooking this and it's gone to waste."

"Girl, it's okay I'll just buy you more food. I know you're struggling." Jasmine offered.

"Oh, no don't put yourself out. You're already letting me stay at your house." Chichi declined.

"How many times did you and Goku let me stay here when I broke down after David died? And who was here for me when when I had my fifth heart attack?" Jasmine asked in a matter of fact tone of voice.

"Well, I guess you're right on that." Chichi admitted in defeat.

"See? It all evens out. Piccolo, do you have her things with you?" She asked.

"Yes, I capsulized them. We're ready to go." He replied.

"Good, now let's go. we could use some rest and I'll make us a nice brunch after that rest. I trust you will inform Dende about what happened?" Jasmine said as she capsulized Chichi's knitting box.

"Yes, I'm going there right now." Piccolo said as he gave Jasmine the capsule contatiner with all of Chichi's and Gohan's things in it.

"Thank you so much for your suport. I appriciate every bit of it." Chichi thanked as Jasmine walked her out of the house. She locked the door and picked Chichi up to take to the skies.

After Jasmine and Chichi made it to the house they unpacked and got the sleeping arrangments set up. Jasmine unfolded the sectional and put some sheets and a comforter on it alone with two pillows for Chichi. Then she tacked the phone number to Gohan's hospital room phone on the bulliton board next to her house phone. She bid Chichi good night as they both went to bed. However neither of them sleaped that morning. For they both lay awake crying there eyes out in their pillows.

**There you have it! Once again thank you for the reviews :)**

**Eight of swords means restriction.**


	5. Chapter 5

Reading of dispair

Chapter five: Three of swords

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

It was Twelve o'clock noon at Jasmine's house when the two ladies had awaken. Chichi and Jasmine had neatly folded the sheets up and returned them to the hall closet with the pillows. Then they folded the fouton back into the sectional and headed for the kitchen table. Chichi had sat at the table trying to rid herself of the black cloud that hung ominously over her head. But that wasn't all, her appearance was awful. She had dark rings around her eyes, her hair had resembled Goku's, and her complection looked so dull and pale. As Jasmine was pulling plates and other necessities out to make noon brunch Chichi was looking around her home.

"You know," she stated in a weak stressed out voice,"I've never once been in your house before. I like how you furnished the place."

"Oh, thank you. You're welcome to come over anytime on my schedual. Military careers are one of the most difficult jobs." Jasmine replied trying to lighten the mood.

A pang of guilt hit Chichi. She realized she never really gave Jasmine a fair chance. After all, here this woman was loveing her son doing all these things for him and even opened her house up to her in her time of need. And she was nothing but unfair towards her. Chichi felt so guilty.

She spoke up,"I'm sorry Jasmine."

Jasmine turned around from the counter to face her and asked,"What're you apologizing for?"

Chichi took a deep breath,"I never was that kind to you and I'm sorry. I know now that your feelings are truly genuine. The reason why I was so distant with you is because I was concerned. At first when you showed up at our home when you wanted to see Goku, I thought he was cheating on me. Then I heard about your past and I felt like you would be a bad influence on Gohan. Then after a while you loved Gohan so much I started to get suspicious of that. Now I realized that I was just being paraniod and crule and wanted to say I'm sorry." Chichi finished remorsfully.

Jasmine's heart had softened. She smiled and replied,"Chichi I never held your paranoia against you at all. You knew I was a recovering alcoholic back then and people were concerned about that. You were just trying to protect your family from that and I applaud that. See in my old nighborhood parents didn't give a damn about who their kids hung out with or what they were doing. But you do and that's why I've always respected you. I use to help kids with abusive, drug addict parents all the time and I still do. I know how bad that is because I was raised by two drug addict foster parents in a crack house in a ghetto ass nighborhood. I've been beatten, naglected, starved, tormented, and even raped at seventeen. So I know why you're concerned because there's a lot of sick bastards in this world. You we're just trying to protect your kid that's all. Any sane mother in their right mind would do what you're doing now for Gohan. You care unlike some people I've met do. And as for the suspicion, don't worry about me being a pedophile or a child molester because I"ve beatten the shit out of those types of people before. I can't stand people who hurt children. It makes me wanna puke. So It's okay and I except you apology."

Chichi smiled," Thanks, I appreciate that."

"Your welcome, and as for today's brunch special is home made sausage, biscuits, and gravy." Jasmine answered.

"Sounds good. But I've noticed something on the mantale above your fire place." Chichi pried.

"Yes?"

"Well, is there a man in your life?"

Jasmine started making the gravy and answered,"Yes, his name was Charle Harriason. We were engadged. He died in the line of duty, I watched it happen before I was injured. The injury I recived is the reason why I can't bare children. His death was the reason why I begain drinking. I was using alcohol to drown my pain. See you're a bit stronger than me in that aspect because you lost Goku twice and haven't even picked up any kind of drug or booze to solve your issues. Another reason why I respect you. Charlie and I met when I was seventeen. He resuced me in one of the Mistresshood's P.O.W (prisoner of war) camps. I was just a young rookie that went to military schools my whole life in a mission to gather intel on the enemy. I was captured and inprisoned in one of their camps. Every single day I was tortured in the most horrible ways ever. And to make it worse, that is the reason why I have so many ghastly scars on my body. I can't even sleep in the dark because of what they did to me. But just when I thought I was going to die, he came. Charlie was a prisoner there too. He and a few other soldiers organized a prison break and he rescued me. I still dream about it to this day. Anyhow, he was too perfect of a man. I think that's why life took him from me. A perfect person always dies so young. By the time I met Goku it was too late to wish him back with the dragon balls." Jasmine finished as she completed the gravy and moved on to cook the sausages and place the biscuits in the oven.

"I'm sorry Jasmine. I had no idea your past was so dark and painful. I'm sorry I even brought it up." Chichi apologized sympatheticly as she was clutching her chest in compassion.

"Don't be, what didn't kill me made me stronger. A woman's motto in life is we don't always do what we want to do but, we always do what we have to do." Jasmine philosipized.

"I can see that." Chichi agreed.

Jasmine laughed," Hell honey, they didn't kill me, those five heart attacks I had in my life didn't kill me, and smoking ain't killin' my ass as much as it use to. So the only question is what the fuck IS gonna kill my ass anyway, right?"

Chichi just laughed,"I don't know. I guess we'll have to wait and see huh?"

Jasmine smiled as they continued talking about their lives together. She worked on brunch while Chichi decided it was a good time to call Gohan at the hospital to check up on him. It was one o'clock in the after noon and Chichi praied Gohan would at least be well enough to pick up the phone.

The phone rang in room twenty two, but there was no one there to answer it. However, a nurse had entered the room to change the bed sheets. She heard the phone ring and picked it up.

"Anchor town hospital paitent recovery this is nurse Golly how may I help you?" She spoke dantily.

"Yes, this is Son Chichi Son Gohan's mother. I'm calling to check up on my son. Where is he?" Chichi asked.

"You just missed him. We wheeled him down to the cancer wing for his first kemo treatment today. Doctor Reich had just come in." She answered.

"Okay, is there anyway I could talk to him?"

Nurse Golly replied,"Yes, I can patch you through right now."

Chichi sighed in relife,"Thank you that'd be great."

The nurse pressed a button on the phone to transfer the call and hung it back up on the reciver.

Meanwhile in the cancer wing.

Gohan had finished his appointment with Doctor Reich the cancer specialist and Doctor Roebuck earlier that morning to review his statis. However they were shocked to see how fast he healed in a ten hour time frame and immediatly got him started on his first round of kemotherapy. He smirked to himself about that morning for Piccolo came to visit him bringing a certant gift from Corin.

**"Good thing Piccolo brought me a senzu bean" **Gohan thought as he looked down aat his arm.

He was already hooked up to the machine that was administering the kemo to him. His mood darkened as he glared at the IV in his arm. He begain to cuss mentally about his father.

**"Damn it dad! What the hell is wrong with you? Here I am needing you and you ran away to otherworld. What the hell kinda father is that?"** Gohan mentally ranted.

He sighed trying to clear his mind as he sat in between two curtains in the kemo treatment room. There was five other paitents in there as well reciving their treatment as well. He looked over at the curtain to his left and opened it for a change of scenery. Then the phone on the small end table next to his right rang. His head turned to his right as he picked it up knowing who it was.

"Hello?"

"Gohan! How are you feeling? How's your treatment going? Do you need anything?" Chichi rambled on sporaticlly.

"It's going good so far, and I'm doing fine. Hurts when the needle goes in but I'm fine. Piccolo came earlier this morning to give me a senzu bean to recover from my surgery faster."

"Oh, that's great! How's your doctor? Is there any questions for me?" Chichi asked.

"Yes, he needs you to come in at three thirty today so he could talk to you about my treatment plan and give you some more "home work" if you know what I mean." He informed with a hint of humor.

"Alright honey, Jasmine and I were going to come up there to visit you anyway as soon as we finish brunch."

"Okay, I'll see you then!" Gohan replied with excitment.

"I love you honey."

"I love you too mom, see ya." He responded as he hung the phone back up.

Then as he turned around and got comfortable, he let out a exausted sigh as he pintched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and middle finger in frustration. It would indeed be a long journey for him. He laid his head back an let a few tears escape his eyes. He couldn't believe he was reduced to this. For god's sake he was the one that defeated Cell. How in the hell can he be struck down with cancer? It just didn't seem right to him at all. Nor did it redgister with him to well. Then he heard the rustle of curtains next to his left side close to the window.

The nurse had come in with another cancer paitent and seated her in the chair net to him. As she sat down and the nurse hooked her up, his attention was purely on her. He continued to stare in a way that had an expression of both question and transfixment to his face. The nurse had left only to reveal a young lycian girl that looked around his age. She was beautiful, her hair was a wavy, long, golden mane that fanned her face perfectly. She had a pretty pair of light blue eyes that sparkled in the sunlight and a fair skin tone that glistened in the sun's noon rays. Her fox like tail hung lazily off the side of the chair just as his did and she wore a light blue sun dress with matching sandals.

For some reason Gohan didn't understand the reason why he was staring so intensly at her but, something about her made him want to call out to her. Her presentce was for some reason making it difficult for him to speak. His heart hammered loudly in his chest so much so you could see it beating on the outside of his chest. His breath caught in his throat as he watched her pull a book out of her bag. She sat cross legged reading as Gohan's thoguhts seemed to stop. Then his gaze traveled down to her legs to see that the sun dress came up to her knees. His cheeks begain to stain a noticable shade of red as a thought entered his mind.

**"What's wrong with me? Why do I feel so funny all of a sudden? But then again why can't I look away?"**

Gohan noted to himself. He'd never felt this way before. But then that's when he caught her scent. He smiffed the air a little. She smelt like cotton candy. Must be some kind of purfume or body spray that girls ofton like to ware. But little did he know this was the start of something wonderful.

**Thank you to**

**Son Gokyu**

**Schubskie**

**Rayvenwolf **

**For reviewing! :) **

**The three of swords means separation.**

**Untill next time.**


	6. Chapter 6

Reading of dispair

Chapter six: Ace of cups

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

Gohan was almost finished with his kemo treatment, but the wasn't looking forward to that any more. He was wanting to talk to that girl. But for some odd reason, he wanted to sniff her too. This threw Gohan for a loop.

**"Sniff her? Where the hell did that come from?" **he thought.

Suddenly he began to feel movement at the bottom of his chair. He looked down seeing his tail had an opinion of it's own about her. The tip of it was moving back and forth rappidly like a rattle snakes. The funny thing was he could't get it to stop. The girl had turned her head to look his way.

"Hi, are you new? I haven't seen you around." She aked innocently.

"Y..yeah. This is my first treatment." He answered.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. It's tough finding out you have cancer. I've had it sense I was ten. I'm eleven now. So, where are you from?"

Gohan felt nervous,"I came from four thirty nine mountain district. That's not here in Anchor town. I came to see a family friend and I collapsed at her front door yesterday and well...here I am."

"My parents just brought me in for my treatment. I have to get them twice a week. I'm greatful I'm lycian because kemo makes human's hair fall out. I know I don't do much with it, I just can't picture myself bald." She laughed trying to lighten his mood.

"I'm half saiyan so I don't know the rules as far as kemotherapy goes yet. But I heard from Aunt Jaz that saiyan and lycian physiology is close to identical."

Realiztion had hit the girl,"Wait, you mean Jasmine Redback? The one kids call Aunt Jaz?" she asked superized.

"Yeah, that's the one. She's known me sense I was a newborn." Gohan confirment.

"Anyway, I forgot to ask you. What's your name? I'm Sky."

"I'm Gohan." He blushed feeling more and more nervous.

"Gohan your tail, why's it moving like that?" She asked pointing at it.

He held it up looking at it qustionably,"I don't know. It's never happened before."

They continued to talk as the nurse came in to unhook Gohan from his IV, completeing his kemotherapy. He walked over to the chair to sit across from Sky and contniued his conversation with her untill her parents came to pick her up. He met her parents and from what he saw they seemed like good folks. Her mother was happy to see that Sky had made a friend. Sky didn't have many friends, she was an outcast in school. But her father was nervous, and had the overly protective monster worm it's way into his heart for she was still his little princess and her new friend just happened to be a boy. Sky gave him her phone number, and bid him fare well the nurse came back in to take him back to room twenty two. But little did Gohan know Krillin, Piccolo, and Jasmine were evsdropping on their conversation.

Chichi caught the last bit of it and all the while chanting "Grand babies" in her head. Once Gohan was in his room he laid on his bed with a big smile on his face. A one he hasn't had in a while. Just then he heard chanting at the door as Krillin, Piccolo, Jasmine, Chichi, Bulma, and Vegeta walked in.

"Hehe, Gohan has a crush! Gohan has a crush. You dog." Krillin chanted.

Gohan's cheeks flushed in annoyment and embarrassment. By now he already knew they seen everything.

"That's not funny!" Gohan huffed.

"Oh yes it is. Pay backs a bitch isn't it?" Krillin replied giggling.

"Oh, hush it Krillin. I know you're short like a child but that doesn't mean you have to act like one." Jasmine shot back.

"Hey! I'm not short I'm fun size!"

"Apparently not the kinda "fun" we're thinking of." Jasmine replied.

The others laughed as everyone sat down. Chichi had finished the meeting with Doctor Reich earlier when they came in about Gohan's kemo treatments. However Vegeta and Jasmine noticed an odd odor in the air coming from Gohan upon entering his room earlier.

"You're in rut brat!" Vegeta announched.

Gohan was confussed,"I'm in what?"

"Rut. That may explain why your tail grew back. You've just hit the saiyan change of adolesentce." He explained.

"What does it mean though? I don't smell anything." Gohan asked sniffing his armpit.

"Uhagh, I swear your idiot father didn't give you the talk did he?"

"No I guess not. Wait, are you talking about the "sex" talk about puberty? Cause if so then no." Gohan stated.

"Figures, I told the oaf he should before the Cell games. Young saiyan boys your age go through rut. it's where your tail releases a type of pharamone to attract females. Your furtile right now, which means that you could get a woman pregnant if you mated with one. Saiyan reproduction is different than humans. With us a saiyan woman could only concive if her mate is furtile rather she's ovulating or not. During this time saiyan boys get aggressive and feral. And the full moon just makes it worse. During a full moon we transform if we have our tails, but if we're in rut we don't. We just get the strong urge to mate." he explained.

Gohan's face flushed even more. He was only eleven and going through this. A thought crossed his mind.

**"Great now I'm gonna get the urge to start humping everything I see."** Gohan groaned mentally.

Krillin giggled,"Yeah may explain why Gohan here has a "woody". He declaired as he pointed at his lap.

Gohan looked down, and he was indeed hard. He didn't even notice. He quickly grabbed a pillow a stuck it on his lap with a fresh wave of embarrassment.

"Shut up and stop mortifiying him jackass!" Jasmine shouted.

"Jeez, Ya didn't have to yell ya know." Krillin remarked.

"Oh, my little boy is growing up. I hope I get those grand babies soon." Chichi announced with a wide smile on her face.

everyone in the room just fell to the ground including Gohan.

"Mom, I'm only eleven!" Gohan whined.

"Yeah my sentaments exactly!" Jasmine declaired a little irratated.

"I think we're forgetting something you guys. Gohan has cancer and a baby would just complicate things." Piccolo stated.

"Exactly. I wouldn't have the strenght to take proper care of it." Gohan replied.

Just then the coco clock in the room went off. Vegeta once again blasted the bird that came out.

"Not again Vegeta!" Bulma yelled.

"Don't start woman!"

"Thank you Vegeta! I can never sleep with that thing going off all the time. Gets on my last nerve." Gohan thanked crankily.

"Wow Gohan, you seem pretty grouchy. You're turning into vegeta." Krillin humorously remarked.

"Well, Doctor Reich told me that mood swings and aggitation were side effects to the kemo." Chichi continued on,"I wish Goku was here. I'm pregnant and stressed out to no end!" She yelled as she begain to cry.

Jasmine brought her into a comforting embrace," It's okay Chichi we're doing the best we can."

Gohan just laid in bed in shock. He couldn't believe it. His mother was pregnant and here he was with cancer while she was stressing out. He snapped.

"Before or after his funeral?" Gohan asked in an aggervated tone of voice.

"What are you saying Gohan?" Chichi was shocked.

"What am I saying?" Gohan repeated angerly.

"Oh, fuck I knew this was coming!" Jasmine declaired.

"You still shouldn't talk that way about your father Gohan." Krillin chastized.

Everyone was shocked. They never expected Gohan of all people to be disrespectful. Let alone to his own father. But what scared them the most was the deranged laughter that poured from his lips.

"Are you kidding me Krillin? What kind of man, a married man for that matter leaves over a threat that doesn't even exist yet. And you all know that if there is an up coming threat we would've handled it. Second of all he left the responsibility of the planet to an eleven year old child his no less and took off. Leaving a pregnant wife and a child who has cancer behind. Don't you think he's needed for that? Mom could use his help right now especially sense I have cancer now. What kind of father or husband does that? And even if he didn't know about this, he still should've came back because this planet isn't the only responsibility he has. What in the hell is wrong with parents these days? That is something Aunt Jaz quoted and I agree with her. I think my father done lost his mind!" Gohan ranted.

"Calm down kid, this isn't helping your condition any." Piccolo sated.

"I know Piccolo but I have to say this." Gohan replied.

"Gohan you know you father loves us. Why are you being so hateful towards him?" Chichi asked heartbroken.

"I'll tell you why mom. He's not even around when we need him for something like this, but if we need his help for a battle he's right there. There's more to it than that. You desurve better. He's always gone! And when he is home he walks all over you. The last time I checked you're a human being not the welcome mat on our front door step I wipe my feet on before I come into the house. The least he could do is come home after the Cell games and help you out around the house sense your pregnant and all. He could also help you out with dealing with this cancer business too." Gohan ranted as a sudden pang of pain hit his chest full force.

He slammed down onto his bed and clasped his chest.

"I think I over did it a little." He moaned in pain.

Everyone rushed to his side checking him to make sure he was alright.

He lifted himself off his bed with a shaky reply," I'm okay. Just an occational pain. Doctor said I'll have thoses."

But then he passed out. Jasmine pressed the call nurse button as the nurse came in and examined him. Luckily there was nothing wrong with him just a pain episode. She informed he would be okay after some rest and he would be able to go home tomarrow. As she left the room everyone was lost in thought as they lie awake to this starling new revealation.

**Thank you to my reviewers hope this fixes you up.**

**The Ace of cups means new love.**

**Untill next time.**


	7. Chapter 7

Reading of dispair

Chapter seven: Two of Pentacles

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

When four o'clock in the after noon came by Gohan was awake and in excutiating pain. His chest and stomach felt like someone was repeatedly stabbing him with a butcher knife and twisting it as it was being pulled out. The nures came back in to give him another dose of his pain medicine to reliven his pain. He lie there whimpering and screaming in pain clutching his stomach and the bed sheets until he calmed down. Chichi and Jasmine were heart broken to see Gohan in such agony as well as the others were feeling such sympathy for the boy. Well not so much Vegeta. He had some sympathy, but not as much as the others. Chichi slowly grabbed on to Jasmine as she held her for comfort. She looked up with tears in her eyes.

"Do you think I'm a bad mother?" She sniffled.

Jasmine was confused at this. She couldn't understand why Chichi would think such a thing. Her face softened with a hint of confusion.

"No honey. Why would you even think such a thing?" Jasmine asked gently.

"Well, I knew he wasn't well at all this whole time and yet I never made the inisitive to get him checked out. I just dismissed it as depression. I just neglected him." She cried grabbing Jasmine's tank top tighter.

"No, Chichi it wasn't your fault. Some times cancer desques itself to be something else. You would've needed a blood test to even see what the real problem was." Jasmine explained.

"Are you sure? I should've asked more questions." Chichi worried.

"Chi, this is the first step to having a child with cancer. People often think it's their fault their child has cancer but it isn't. The sooner you realize it isn't your fault the better you're going to feel. So, no more of that it's my fault shit okay?" Jasmine said in a comforting tone.

"Thank you, for being a true friend." She replied with a small sad smile.

"It's what I do. Fightin' isn't the only thing I'm good for." Jasmine smiled giving her the best of friendship in the world.

Vegeta had got a little discusted with the display of love.

"Will you two stop with the sentimental shit already!" Vegeta snapped.

Jasmine's head snapped in his direction where he was standing and her eyes narrowed in a ferocious snarl.

"This is her son we're talking about! What if that was Trunks in that bed with cancer, huh? Would you be saying that bullshit to us if I was over here comforting Bulma? What in the hell is wrong with you? Get a goddamn heart transplant and learn how to have some compassion!" Jasmine lectured.

"You're just like Kakarot. Too damn soft to be a warrior. The brat is saiyan, he'll live." Vegeta retorted.

"You know, that's your answer for everything isn't it? Yoy know why? Because you're insecure as hell, that's why! You think that everytime you're in public or around anything that has heart in it everyone can see all your secrets and insecurities. That's why you're an asshole. See, I like to have "real" men as friends. Not little boys that throw temper tantrums if they can't control a situation. You know what's gonna happen to you? You're gonna grow into a bitter old man if you don't figure out what your problem is. Then your son is going to grow up to resent you and your wife may end up leaving you because of it. Do you want that huh? To die cold and lonely with nobody there to want you? I see the way you talk to Bulma and about your son and with the rate you're going, that cold and lonely part might just happen. Ain't nobody wanna be around all that attitude. I know you ain't got no sense but the least you can do in this situation is act like you got some. Show some damn respect!" Jasmine ranted angerly. She couldn't believe He was being so heartless.

"Tch, Whatever, I'm going outside." Vegeta responded not wanting to hear anymore.

"Good, go on outta here with all that attitude then, get to steppin'!" Jasmine retorted back.

He walked out of the room with a growl as Bulma remained inside. Jasmine sighed as Piccolo shook his head in disaproval. Bulma just stood there embarrassed by his actions.

"I'm sorry you guys, he shouldn't have said that." Bulma apologized.

"What're you apologizing for Bulma? It's not your fault. He's always been that way." Krillin questioned.

"Yeah, he's right. Vegeta's a grown ass man. You don't have to apologize for his attitude problem. I don't know how you deal with his shit every day." Jasmine replied agreeing with Krillin.

"I know but I don't understand why he's like that." Bulma stated.

"Look Bulma, I know he had a hard life and was fucked up in the head just like I was, but that doesn't mean he has to take it out on all of us. It's all in how you cope with it later in life. I know I don't do that shit to you guys." Jasmine noted.

Just then Gohan woke up with a painful groan. Everyone in the room turned their attention to Gohan as his eyes slowly opened. He felt numb. The medicine put him out cold.

"Oh, man. That shot always puts me out." He moaned.

Piccolo looked at the clock and saw it was getting late. At six o'clock everyone had bid far well to Gohan and headed home. Vegeta was still outside waiting for Bulma. No sooner did they leave she went off on him and they got into a nasty argument. Chichi went back to Jasmine's house, Krillin went back to Kame house, and Piccolo stayed close to the hospital just in case Gohan needed anything. Sleeping had been painful for Gohan. His nights were endless, full of nothing but tossing and turning in pain. But the sad part was Chichi and Jasmine had two situations they were dealing with. Gohan having cancer and now a new addition to the family. All they did that night was sit alone on the couch together while they watched television and talked about good past memories.

**Two months later**

Everything had begain to look up for the Son family. Chichi was two months along in her pregnantcy, Gohan was coping a little better with his cancer, and he and Sky were growing remarkably close. Chichi was histarical about it, Krillin teased him as usual, and Jasmine was giving him pointers about impressing girls. Gohan had already met Sky's parents. It took a while to earn her father's trust but he earned it fairly. They went out on dates when every they could. He graduated school earily and got a novel published. The extra money helped out a lot with the finances and everything seemed to be falling into place.

Today Gohan and Sky were on one of their dates. They were sitting at the edge of the lake. She was an artist and loved to draw she just so happen to bring her sketch pad with her to show Gohan her work. But today she was working on a special drawing.

"What's this?" Gohan asked as he scooted closer to her. He knew her work always held some kind of meaning behind it.

She turned to him and smiled holding her latest creation up to him. Gohan was amazed, she truely was an artist. On the pad of paper was him in super saiyan two form but he notice something about it. There was a heart drawn on the center of his chest and not one of those valentine ones but how it actually looked in medical terms. But in the center of the heart there was a big hole in the middle that was bleeding profusely. That wasn't all, there was like a blue forcefield of energy surounding the heart with a bird trying to get in. Gohan was confused by the meaning.

"What's it's message?" Gohan asked.

She smiled and explained while pointing to the various parts of the drawing,"This is you at your best. This is your heart, the hole is all the pain you're hiding from me, and the blood stands for your sorrow. The forcefield is the wall you put up to protect yourself and the bird, is me. The heart is where I wanna be but the field is blocking the damage I see that I wanna help you fix. I wanna help you plug that hole up and stop the bleeding in order to see you happier."

Gohan was shocked, he never knew she could see his pain so well. But then again she did have a talent for portraying things on paper.

"I never would've guessed that even though I did tell you everything about myself." He said as he hugged her.

They sat like that for a while. Him on her chest listening to her heart beat. Some how a heart beat of a loved one always made him feel so calm. Then he noticed something. He remembered what Jasmine had told him about true love. She often talked about her feelings about Charlie to him. And at that moment he realized...he found it. Her heart beat was that same rhytm as his and how he would say something and before he would finish his sentence she would say the every next thing he was going to say. She held him and stroked his hair as his tail twined itself with hers. They laid there like that for a while untill it was time to go home.

Gohan and Sky were on the door step to the Son house when they noticed the light in the hall way was on. This was odd to Gohan.

**"That's weird. Mom never has that light on during the day."** Gohan thought suspisously.

However this was wasn't a coinsidence. For when they opened the door they both gasped at the grizzly sight before them.

**Whoa cliff hanger!**

**What did they walk into?**

**Find out soon!**

**Thank you to my reviewers! You guys are awsome :D**

**The Two of pentacles means two situations at once.**


	8. Chapter 8

Reading of dispair

Chapter eight: Five of wands

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

The sight before them was an awful one to behold. As they stood in the door way with shocked expressions on their faces, a wave of panic washed over them. What they saw in the house was blood, loads of it. It was all over the floor, on the kitchen counter, and even trailed into the hall way. Gohan bolted through the house, adrenaline pumping through his veins. His heart raced in panic as he ran through the hall way where the blood trail stopped at the bathroom door. Gohan paused, there was crying and sniffling sounds coming from inside. He slowly opened the bathroom door only to see his mother sitting on the edge of the bath tub.

"Mom! What happened?" Gohan exclaimed in panic.

Chichi looked up at him, her face was flushed and wet with tears. She didn't respond to him for she hung her head and begain to sob even harder. The blood was everywhere, in the bathroom. And for the life of him Gohan couldn't figure out where it came from. He begain to grow impatient and knelt down to her so he could make eye contact with her. He placed his hands on her shoulders and looked up at her.

"Mom, what happened?" Gohan asked this time in a more calmer voice.

By then Sky came trodding into the room. The tentsion in the bathroom was killing Gohan and Sky as Chichi finally spoke.

She spoke wtih a whimpered cry,"I..I"m sorry Gohan, I wasn't feeling well because of all the stress I was going through with your dad being gone and you having cancer that I was having these wierd stomach pains. I was sitting in the living room when it happened and I went to get up to use the bathroom and blood came gushing out of me, and...and."

"And what mom? What happened?" Gohan probed for answers in concern.

"I couldn't stop bleeding and,...I lost it. I LOST IT! OH GOD!" She finished as she sobbed with all her strength.

Gohan and Sky were shocked beyond all words as Gohan pulled her into a strong comforting embrace. The miscarrage was too far under way. They knew with all the blood she lost that it was already too late to save the baby. Sky walked slowly over to the tub and sat next to Chichi and Gohan and held her from the other side. Sky silently cried as she held her trying her best to comfort her. Gohan looked up at sky and handed her his cell phone.

"Here, call Aunt Jaz and then call the others and tell them to get over here now." He ordered.

Sky took his phone and wiped her nose on her sleeve with a sniffle,"Okay."

Sky had finished making all the calls and everyone was over there in the blink of an eye. Gohan answered the door to let everyone in. Jasmine was the first to enter along with Piccolo. Everyone poured into the house bumbarding him with questions as he tried to answer them the best he could. While that was going on Jasmine went to the bathroom to check on Chichi. An hour had passed sense then. Jasmine was just finishing checking Chichi as Gohan and Krillin were cleaning up the blood togther. Piccolo was there watching Gohan intensly to keep him calm, for he was on the verge of a break down. He was silent the whole time sheading tears here and there while they finished cleaning the mess. Once they were done cleaning the hall way Jasmine came back out with her Black, leather, medic bag with a sorrowful expression.

Everyone looked up at her with questioning eyes waiting for the news. Jasmine covered her mouth with a trembling hand and let a few tears fall from her eyes. She took a deep calming breath.

"I'm so sorry Gohan, but your mother just miscarried. By the time she started bleeding profusely it was already too late. I'm sorry honey." Jasmine softly cried.

Everyone was devistated. Gohan froze in shock as his eyes watered even more. He begain to cry as he ran up to her wrapping his arms around her thighs. He sobbed into her black, desert camo pants as every one else came forth to hold Gohan from all directions. After about a minute Gohan broke the silence.

"How is she now?"

"She lost a lot of blood so right now she's in her bed room right now reciving a blood transfusion. I had some of her type with me." Jasmine saddly regarded.

"M...may I go see her? She probably needs help cleaning up." Gohan muttered.

"Yes, but I already cleaned her up and changed her clothes. She's resting now." Jasmine informed.

Everyone gave him some space to walk to his mother's bedroom. Sky had placed her hand on Gohan's shoulder. He looked over at him only to notice she too had been crying.

"Gohan, I called my parents as well they'll be over shortly." Sky sniffed.

"Okay, I'm gonna check on mom." Gohan replied saddly as he continued on his way to her bedroom.

He opened the door and qiuetly walked into the room shutting the door behind him. He saw her sitting up in the bed grasping the sheets tightly as tears continued their decent on her face. Gohan made his way to the bed and sat next to her on the left side.

"Mom, is there anything you need?"

"No, I'm fine. Just someone to talk to."

"Alright. I'm right here." Gohan reasured.

"I wish your father was here to help me Gohan. I really could've used his help. But he chose not to come back. I'm sure if he knew this was going to happen, he would've never left." Chichi stated calmly.

Gohan's eye brow twitched at that comment as he spoke up,"Yeah we do need his help but he dumped his responsibilities on me. But that's okay, I won't run from you. Ever!" He responded with devotion and courage.

Chichi didn't say anything after that. She knew it was pointless to try to convence him that Goku didn't mean to leave all this mess to his son. Just then a knock sounded at the door as Chichi called them in. It was Robby and Crystal, Sky's parents.

"How are you feeling honey? If there's anything we can do for you, just let us know." Crystal said gently, trying to ease her pain.

"I'm stable physically, and thank you. Why don't Sky stay the night here? Gohan probably needs some emotional suport." Chichi suggested glumly.

"Sure, I'll go pack her things." Robby informed as he left the room.

"Thanks mom, but worry about recovering yourself for now." Gohan replied as he held Chichi's hand.

Once night fell, everyone had went home exept Piccolo, Jasmine, and Sky. Piccolo and Jasmine stayed out in the living room as Sky and Gohan was in his room. They left the the door to his room and Chichi's room open so Gohan could hear her call him for anything. Gohan and Sky stayed up for most of the night talking about Goku. She brought up the fact that she never met his father and Gohan told her everything about his past and the Cell games. They finally went to sleep after Gohan checked on Chichi. Gohan felt like his world was crumbling as Sky slipped into his bed and slept beside him for the night. She held him just as she always did and humed to him until he fell asleep. However, even though Chichi wanted grandchildren she asked Jasmine to keep an eye on those two in case they got too friendly in there. After all they were still eleven.

**There. Chapter eight yeah!**

**Thank you to Rayvenwolf for reviewing and editing. **

**My spelling sucks bad! -_-;**

**The Five of wands means struggle or compition. **

**But the meaning is struggle for this chapter. **

**Also thank you to my reviewers.**


	9. Chapter 9

Reading of dispair

Chapter nine: Chariot

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

Gohan had woken up bright and earily the next morning and quietly slipped out of bed so as to not wake up Sky. He sighed as he walked out of his room and down the hall way to the kitchen. The smell of breakfast wafted into his nostrils as he yet again had no desire to eat. He had already threw up late last night when Chichi was asleep. Sky, Jasmine, and Piccolo came into the bathroom at that moment to comfort him. A little blood was present in his vomit, but that was to be expected because Calife makes the inner lining of the stomach bleed a little occationally. Once he was in the kitchen he saw Jasmine cooking breakfast and Piccolo outside meditating. Chichi was still fast asleep just like Sky was. Jasmine looked behind her at the kitchen table to see Gohan taking a seat.

"Good morning, how are you feeling?" She asked.

Gohan looked up at her with sleepy eyes,"In pain in every single asspect." He answered blandly.

"You have to take your meds Gohan. And I checked on your mother, she's better after the blood transfusion. She's still sound asleep and I decided to make breakfast to take some load off her." Jasmine informed.

"Thanks Aunt Jaz, I really appreciate what you're doing for this family. It means a lot to us. And yes, I do have to take my meds before I eat because if I don't I'm just gonna throw everything back up and my stomach is gonna start bleeding again." He said as he walked to the fridge to pull out a glass vile of medicine.

"Okay, I went over that cook book Doctor Reich gave you so I know what you can and can't have to eat. I also went to the super market this morning to pick some stuff up." Jasmine replied as Gohan continued to pull out his med supplies.

Gohan had a lot of med supplies. This cancer did indeed invoulve so much medicine. He had to drink a nasty twenty ounce medicine shake to coat his stomach before he ate to keep it from bleeding on the inside. Then after his meal he'd have to drink a special tea to calm his nausea, and then take an injection in the stomach through a tube for the pain. The injection was a huge knock out to him literally. It put him out for two hours. But the up side to that was he only had to take one of those shots a day. The tea he drank whenever he felt nauseated which was most of the time and the tube in his stomach he had to change once a week. The shake he had to keep refridgerated like the vile of serium and only drank that before each meal.

His stomach was so sensitive that he'd start bleeding if food so much as touched it. He had to be on a strict diet because of it too. No sugar, startch, carbanated drinks, salt, citric fruits and vegetables, and some artifical presurvatives. The truth was, he hated it. He had to cut most of his favorite foods out of his diet completely. But he delt with it the best he could and stuck to his diet. Gohan sat at the table and pulled out two sheets of paper towels and placed a sterilized tube cleaning and changing kit on top of them. Then he pulled off his shirt and placed it on the back of his chair.

Jasmine watched as she finished cooking. She couldn't believe Gohan, her favorite little guy had a tube surgically embeded in the side of his stomach. It was located on the right side next to his third ab muscle. She cringed in pain as she watched him do his weekly tube change. Gohan opened the sterilized pack and pulled on the gloves. He pulled out the cleaning packet with the iodine swabs in it and tore it open. Jasmine made sure she was at least ten feet away from him when he did his cleaning. If she stood too close he could risk airborne bactirial contamination that could result in a nasty infection. Because of this he could no longer train for he was really fragile and the risk of the tube getting lodged dangerously into his stomach.

Gohan placed the packet down on the paper towels next to the kit and unscrewed the used tube from his stomach to throw it away in the red hazmat ben the hospital gave him with his supplies. Once that was done he took the three iodine swabs and cleaned the screw cap and opening in a circular motion. He threw those swabs away in the ben and pulled out another packet of swabs that was saturated in rubbing alcohol. He then repeated the action with those swabs and threw them out. After that, he pulled out a new tube and opened the starilized pack and screwed it on the cap and pulled his gloves off trashing them. Then he pulled his shirt back on and opened the shake to start drinking it.

He paused after drinking half of it. Usually he downed it due to how nasty it tasted. He looked up at Jasmine only to see a look of pain on her face.

"I'm sorry, I'm just not use to seeing this." She stammered.

"I know. You're a military doctor. You're not use to working with cancer paitents let alone seeing me with it. I understand." Gohan sympatized.

"Yes, you were always my favorite little guy sense I knew you at newborn stage. I feel sick seeing you suffer." Jasmine said sorrowfully as she hugged him.

"I know. And by the way, you still call the groscery store the super market?" He asked jokingly while trying to change the subject.

"Yeah, why?"

"That's what they called it in the fifties! You're not that old. You were born in nineteen seventy for god's sake." Gohan laughed.

"Well I grew up with people calling it that. And when you have kids they'll laugh at you too for saying things in past terms." Jasmine lectured.

"Hahahahahahah! Please don't get mom started about grandbabies. She's like a pringle can on that subject. Once she pops, she just don't stop." Gohan moaned trying to not get depressed.

"Oh, man her. I've seen some grandchild nuts worse than her, trust and believe." Jasmine laughed.

"Don't even go there about the people you use to hang out with. I know you hung out with some crazies." Gohan replied.

" I know with as much shit as I told you and your mother about the things I did when I was her age, oh you'd think I was on crack or something." She laughed.

"Anyway, where's Piccolo?"

"In the front yard meditating and listening in on our conversation." Jasmine replied.

"Okay, because I didn't see him on the couch when I came down here." Gohan replied.

"He was outside before I got up to go to the store." Jasmine informed.

Just then, Sky came out rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Jasmine looked up with a smile on her face.

"Hey, good morning just in time for breakfast! Take a seat."

"Okay, I just took my medicine." Sky yawned.

A embarrassing idea popped into Jasmine's head, she was going into mother mode. She had the habit of embarrassing Gohan like a parent would their child. She held off on it until she served breakfast and they started eating. Jasmine took her seat and picked up her fork.

"Sooooooo, what'd you two do last night?" Jasmine pried.

"We talked about my father and went to bed." Gohan answered.

"Yeah, uh huh."

"What? We didn't have sex if that's what you're empling." Sky cut in.

Gohan spat out his food at the word "sex".

"WHAT? We didn't do that! Were eleven!" Gohan screatched.

"No no no no, calm down. I mean your mother wanted me to periodically check on you two and I just had to snap a picture." Jasmine chuckled as she pulled out her digital camera and showed them the picture.

The picture revealed Sky and Gohan sleeping together in his bed cuddling. Jasmine laughed as their faces turned bright red.

"I'm keeping this bitch as black mail." Jasmine chuckled.

"Awww, come on Aunt Jaz!" Gohan whined.

"Hey, all's fair in love and war my friend."

"That is so true." Sky chuckled embarrassed.

Chichi came down the stares and sat at the table. Jasmine surved her breakfast, but Chichi didn't say anything. It took Jasmine thirty minutes to convince her to eat. She finally did and Jasmine decided to do something with all three of them to take their minds off the reacent tradgic event. They went to the park and took a canoe ride. They talked about their memories and laughed as Jasmine cracked open a bottled coke.

"Jasmine? How in the world are we friends again?" Chichi asked.

"I don't know. Maybe I grew on ya? You're guess is as good as mine."

"True?' Sky agreed.

"I'm worried about you Gohan." Chichi stated.

"Mom, worry about recovering first. I'm more concerned about you." Gohan answered.

"Gohan you're my concern. You're my son. Now's a perfect time to tell me why you're upset with your father. And I heard your talk with Sky last night. It wasn't hateful but I just want you to know I'm here for you."

Gohan sighed,"I know he left for the good of the planet but it wasn't necessary. I defeated Cell the planet was not in danger anymore so he should've come back. He had other responsibilities to tend to besides the planet. I felt like he took everything he had including his family for granted. Do you know how many people would kill just to have a chance at life again or to have all the stuff he has? Great friends, a loving son, and a wife that stays loyal to him and does everything for him? It just doesn't make sense at all." Gohan explained.

"I see your point Gohan but why do you hate him?" Jasmine asked as Chichi agreeed.

"Because he took us all for granted, left when he didn't have to, tossed us a side when he should be here being a husband and a father, put unnecessary stress on both of us, that stress caused our recent loss, and it also caused my cancer. And when he was home he was gone most of the day and didn't come back till dark. He should've been more involved with his family than he was. Now I know why you always complained at him as much as you did because...deep down you wanted the same thing out of him." Gohan finished choked up.

"Gohan, honey. You know he did his best. You can't blame or hate him for that." Chichi interjected trying to reason with him.

It was true, Chichi wanted Goku to be more involved with the family with every day life but she didn't want her son to hate his own father. She didn't want that kind of pain or any other added stress on Gohan. If he got too stressed then he'd wind back up in the ER and she was trying to avoid that. Gohan begain to cry as he looked up at Chichi.

"You guys don't get it," he muttered saddly,"I needed him to be a father to me, not a hero or a teacher."

With that he took off in tears.

"Gohan wait!" Chichi and Jasmine cried in unison.

"Sky, stay here with Chichi. I'm gonna go after him." Jasmine stated as she took off.

She then took to the sky fallowing Gohan's energy. It fluctuated oddly as it held such emotional tremoil. A wave of worry came over her as she continued to fly after him. Then she felt another energy signal. It was Piccolo. He stopped her in her tracks as he sent a telepathic message to her.

**"Jasmine, I have Gohan. I'm going to talk to him. It's best if you went back to bring his mother and girlfriend home."**

**"Alright, bring him back home when he's done venting. I want him relaxed when he comes back." **

With that she turned around and headed for the canoe to take Chichi and Sky back home.

**Another chapter done!**

**Once again thank you to my reviewers :D**

**The Chariot means Mind over matter.**

**Until next time**


	10. Chapter 10

Reading of dispair

Chapter ten: Five of pentacles

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

Once Jasmine had returned to the canoe she informed Chichi and Sky about Piccolo having Gohan and took them home. Chichi felt lost and didn't know how to help Gohan. Sky was in a similar position. Jasmine had some idea of this though. This was why she decided to call forth a little meeting on his behalf. Once the three of them were at the front door of the house Chichi unlocked it and let Jasmine and Sky in before closing and locking the door behind her. Jamine sat on the couch with Sky as she once again called her parents to let them know that she was going to be there longer than expected.

"I haven't a clue what to do Jasmine! I had no idea Gohan harbored such feelings for Goku." Chichi cried feeling absolutly helpless.

"I seen it ccoming Chichi. Goku should've heeded my warning." Jasmine replied.

"What do you mean Aunt Jaz?" Sky asked.

"I mean I had a conversation with him about his future choices regarding this family and the planet. I told him spacificly that he would cause Gohan to not only lose trust in him but resent him as well. He told me he was going to have a conversation with Gohan later that night. I also told him that Gohan wasn't a big fan of the preiveious choice he made about staying on Yardrat longer than he needed. Not only that, but Gohan came over to my house the night you guys tried to wish him back. He told me he wished Goku cared a little more about his family when he made these choices. That's why I talked to Goku about it. Now my question is, did he talk to Gohan like he said he would?" Jasmine questioned as she informed everyone.

"I'm not sure if he did. I always felt left out of their bond. In a way I was a little jealous of Gohan and Goku's bond. It was a good bond and I'm glad it was there but Gohan and I never bonded the way he and Goku did. I believe it was because I kept him in his room so much studying. So because of this I wanted to try and bond with him though letting him graduate earily so he could have the rest of his childhood back. I actually believe he resented me for that." Chichi sniffled while sitting down on the love seat.

Jasmine sighed,"Chichi, he didn't resent you for it. He only wanted to spend more time with you that didn't involve work. All that was is he only wanted to see the you behind the skillet and he even told me that. So he made it clear that he doesn't hate you for it."

"Really? So this whole time I thought he was distant towards me for nothing?"

"Yes, but it's okay. All he wants to do is spend time with you. That's all any child wants really." Jasmine clarified.

"That's kinda what mom and I did when I spent a lot of time with dad. She felt left out so whenever I do something, I'm sure to include both of them." Sky spoke confidently.

"Anyway, you said that you don't know if Goku really talked to Gohan that night. Well, Sky sense you two spent last night cuddling and talking about Goku, did Gohan mention that?" Jasmine asked.

"Yes, he did. And yes Goku did talk to Gohan that night." Sky clarified truthfully.

The three of them talked about this issue as time passed. As they waited for Gohan's return home Chichi fixed lunch much to Jasmine's dismay.

Meanwhile, Gohan and Piccolo were in the back of the park were it was sicluded so they could talk in private. They sat under a willow tree facing across from each other. Gohan had a frustrated scowl on his face. A one that could make even Vegeta envious. Piccolo notice this and thought it was a good time to speak to him.

"Gohan, out with it. I know what's going on."

"I resent the fact that my father left his family out of his dicision to stay in other world because it's causing mom unneeded stress on top of me having cancer and it caused her to miscarry. Not to mention the emotional stress he put on me that caused the damn cancer in the first place." Gohan ranted calmly and colected.

"What stress did he put on you that caused the cancer?" Piccolo asked confused.

"The Hyperbolic time chamber, the Cell games, and his recent choice to stay in other world." Gohan answered blandly.

"I see, but I thought you wanted to go into the chamber."

"Yes, I did. I only did that to spend time with him while I trained. Plus I knew you guys would need me." Gohan answered bluntly.

"Kid, you know your father loves you. He would've spent time with you regardless." Piccolo stated.

"I don't know if I could believe that anymore. Ever sense dad unlocked the secret to becoming a super saiyan we've...been growing apart. Like when he got back from Yardrat. He didn't spend much time with me or mom for that matter. He would wake up in the morning, eat breakfast, and then be gone all day from then until six o'clock dinner time. Then he'd shower, change, and go to bed. The time we went to Aunt Jaz's house when mom kicked dad out for making a mess was the first time in a while we actually did something together that didn't involve trainning. Not that I minded trainning from time to time. Then that's when Aunt Jaz gave him a talk about him and the effects of his choices in life." Gohan explained.

"I see, so you felt like he neglected your emotional needs?" Piccolo pried questionably.

"Yes, it was always eat, train, and sleep with him. No family time or anything. One night I heard mom and dad bickering that he wasn't being...well, ya know intamate with her anymore. He'd always claim to be too tired from trainning to do any...bedroom things that married people do." Gohan stated with a hint of embarrassment.

_Flashback_

_ It was seven o'clock in the eveing when Goku ate dinner, showered, and changed for bed. He climbed into bed to go to sleep for the night when all of a sudden a feminine hand begain to fondle his abs and moving furhter down south. Goku turned around on his side to see who the culprite was. Chichi laid on her side with a lustly smirk on her lips as she leanded over to kiss his neck._

_"You know I missed you. Why don't we spend some quality time together tonight." Chichi whispered._

_"Gee Chichi I'd really love to but, I'm so exsausted from trainning." Goku yawned._

_"Oh, for god's sake Goku! That's all you've been doing lately! Is it a crime to want to have sex with my own husband once in a while?" Chichi huffed feeling neglected._

_"No, but how can I do anything when I'm tired? It wouldn't be very good that way." Goku reasoned._

_"No it wouldn't but, you could at least spend time with me. I am your wife not just the woman that cooks and cleans for you. I think I deserve a little thanks now and again." She stated a bit aggervated with him._

_"well, I could pull my boxers off and you could ride me." Goku suggested lacking entusiasum._

_"Goku, you're missing the point! What's the use of that when you're just going to fall asleep when I'm on top? I want you to do your part too." Chichi rationalized._

_"I won't fall asleep." Goku stated._

_ They continued bickering while Gohan was awake in bed in his room. Unfortunatly for him the walls of the house were paper thin and he could hear everything. He was six at the time and just recently found out what sex was and what it does from the new health text books his mother bought for him. Gohan was kinda greatful they didn't do it that night, but if he had a choice he'd rather have his parents getting along in some way instead of arguing. Even if that "getting along" ment they were having sex. He just laid in bed on his back blushing the whole time as the argument went on._

_End of flashback_

"So you see Piccolo, I'm not the only one." Gohan finished explaining the story.

Piccolo couldn't believe it. Gohan just told him a story about his parents lack of sex life. He sat there blushing with a look of embarrassment on his face as they continued talking.

Piccolo took Gohan home as promised. Gohan bid him farwell as he walked up to the front door. He knocked and Chichi answered letting him in. Something wasn't right with the atmosphere as he looked around to see the Z fighters all at the house. His stomach did flips as Piccolo walked in behind him.

"Hey, glad to see you again kid." Yamcha said as he waved.

"Uh, I don't mean to be rude but, why's everyone here? Did something else happen while I was gone?" Gohan asked.

**Uh oh what's gonna happen?**

**Again thank you to my reviewers!**

**The five of pentacles means loneliness. Gohan feels he's alone with his feelings towrd his father.**

**Till next time!**


	11. Chapter 11

Reading of dispair

Chapter eleven: Three of wands

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

Everyone was in the living room of the Son house. Crystal and Robby were even there. Jasmine motioned for Gohan to sit between her and Sky on the couch. In all honesty Gohan felt nervous, he didn't know what to expect. He sat on the couch in the errey silence that hung in the room like a thick four hundred count blanket. His insides quivered with uneasiness as he sat, nervousness ratiating from his body. After his little chat with Jasmine, Sky, and Chichi in the canoe and later with Piccolo, it lead him to believe that someone might have ratted him out to everyone else. His mind begain to race as his body begain to ache from the stress of the situation.

He couldn't be under any stress at all. For it caused more bleeding in his stomach. Usualy he'd throw up every day in the wee hours of the morning. And it was not an uncommon occurance to see blood in the vomit. There were times when he'd unrinate blood or have a bowel movement that had blood in the stool. He had brought this up to Doctor Reich and he'd always do a weekly blood test on him to check his statis with the kemo and his blood count. Truth was, Gohan had more blood transfusions that he could count because of his continious bleeding. He wasn't hemoraging or bleeding at a dangerous speed but Doctor Reich would always have a blood transfusion ready for Gohan to make sure he didn't lose to much blood.

Sometimes Gohan expierianced loss of appitite, wight loss, and mood swings. Everyone would sometimes walk on thin ice around him because his mood swings were so unpredictable. There had been a time were Krillin teased him about Sky again at a cook out Jasmine invited everyone to. He blew up and cussed him out. Chichi did give him a scolding for it, nothing too bad as he was use to. But later on after he went in the bathroom to calm down he was quick to find Krillin and apologize to him for being as Gohan put it "a real asshole." Krillin smiled and hugged him exepting his apology and that was the end of that. However Gohan couldn't help but feel like something was wrong.

Everyone looked at him so intensely that he felt really small. It wasn't hateful or disapointing looks he was recieving but he still felt small. Kinda like that black speck he tried to clean off the window when he was helping his mother clean the house. Gohan often pitched in on cleaning the house with her so she wouldn't have to do so much while she was pregnant. He also learned to give himself his medicine to help her out. Even though she wanted to take care of her "baby" he still wanted to help. After he took his meds and ate breakfast he'd help with dishes, laundary, and other chores around the house. He kept his lap top with him to work on his novels while folding laundary.

He had always wrote books when he was younger. Noveling was something he enjoyed on the side. Gohan had at least twelve novels on his book shelf that he wrote when he was ages seven through ten and when he graduated earily he started looking at careers. Chichi was happy about the idea that Gohan was getting off to a great start in his young life but also wanted him to be a kid too. But he spent his time looking and realized he had restrictions. He didn't want to leave home to go to collage because of his mother's pregnancy and his cancer kept him from doing certant things. So he looked for a stay at home job, plus Goku's tournament money ran out so they needed financal security.

Then that's when the idea came to him. He found a publishing company and mailed his novel "Blasts that last" in. Three weeks later they called him telling him they would like to publish it. Gohan and Chichi was extatic and they called Jasmine to tell her the news. Then later people begain to read it and wanted more of his work. He was superized to hear this, he didn't think too many people would read it but he was wrong. Money came pouring in the mail so he got a bank account to better manage his money. But that wasn't all, people started reconizing him in public and he had already published "Sing a song of war." He was also at a book store at an autograph booth.

He was succsesful, and it made Chichi proud. Gohan became proud of the fact that he could still do so much even if cancer took a few things from him. But right now, the current situation he was dealing with puzzled him dramaticly. He wanted to say something but was so nervous the words wouldn't come out. Jasmine and Sky felt him trembling between them. Gohan thought to himself as his brain suddenly became a busy high way full of racing thoughts.

**"What's going on here? Why's everyone staring at me? Did I do something wrong? What if Mom heard me last night?"** Gohan thought spazticly.

His thoughts took him back to last night when he was in the shower. Apparently he was in rut again and needed to rub one out. He didn't think he was being too loud but he was afraid someone would come in and see him masturbating against the shower wall. Finally the silence broke as Chichi made an anouncement.

"Gohan, I'll bet you're wondering why we're all here."

Gohan nervoiusly answered,"Yes, did I offend anyone. Because if I did, I'm sorry."

"No, that's not it Gohan. I called this meeting for another reason. It has come to our attention that you need more medical attetion." Jasmine replied.

"What do you mean? Did Doctoer Reich call back with bad test results?" He aked.

"No, Gohan. Jasmine noticed that you have another issue that needs worked out to keep you from stressing out anymore than you already are." Chichi answered.

At first Gohan didn't know how to answer to that. After all he already had cancer, what else could posibly be wrong? Then the thought hit him.

"This wouldn't happen to be the problem I have with dad would it?" Goham asked suddenly.

"No, I'm sending you to a phyciarist."Chichi informed.

"Yes, I brought up the idea. All we want to do is unload some of the stress you're feeling. And I know you're feeling a lot of it too." Jasmine answered.

"We don't think you're crazy Gohan, we just want to help anyway we can." Sky stated.

"Yeah, this isn't healthy for someone your age." Krillin added.

"Well, I haven't felt healthy in a long long time. And I don't think it'll change any time soon." Gohan muttered a little irritated.

"We know, That's why I thought this would be good for you." Chichi stated trying to keep him calm.

"Mom we aren't exactly "normal" people. As soon as I talk to a phycaiatrist they'll send me to a nut house." Gohan pointed out.

"Not with the one I got for you. She's my phycaiatrist, Doctor Rose Jets. She's a lycian one, so she's not exactly ignorant of people like us." Jasmine stated.

"So, what do ya say kid? Will you exept the help?" Yamcha asked hoping he would.

"Well, it couldn't hurt."Gohan sighed in defeat.

"She'll be in when you take you're kemotherapy so you'll be able to see her afterwards." Jasmine informed.

"Okay, I'll tr...

Just then Gohan's hand flew to his mouth as his cheeks begain to bulgde. He dashed into the kitchen so fast no one could see it. He grabbed onto the trash can and spewed. Blood was present in he vomit. Chichi and Sky raced to his side as Jasmine pulled out her medic bag reaching for a blood drawing kit. Chichi grabbed a kitchen towel to clean Gohan up as Sky rubbed his back. Everyone else was in a state of shock as they seen him rise up and sit on a chair with blood all over his lips. Jasmine rushed to his side to draw blood and test the sample.

"How often has he vomited today?" Jasmine asked.

"Twice! My poor child!" Chichi cried while Jasmine drew his blood.

Once that was finished it took two hours to get the blood test results. Jasmine came back in the living room with the results.

"He isn't bleeding too badly but, I would say give him another dose of his shake medicine." She advised.

Gohan just sat on the chair with his eyes sqeezed closed in pain while Chichi grabbed his medicine. He downed it in one big gulp cringing at the nasty taste and grabbed his vile that was on the table. He opened a clean needle and drew the recomended dose of syrium from the vile. Then he pulled up his shirt and inserted the needle in the tube in his stomach. Once the pain medicine was administered he tossed the needle in the red ben and Chichi put the vile back in the fridge. He sat there taking deep breaths as everyone watched with painstrickened expressions on their faces. They witnessed how painful it was for him to stick the needle in the tube in his stomach.

The tube was there to giude the needle to his stomach so he was injecting it in the right place. He couldn't get the tube wet unless he had one of those protecting latex bandages over it. He had to ware those in the shower and couln't swim in the lake anymore. If he chose to swim he would have to go in an indoor pool. Gohan felt weak as the medicine was begining to make him drowsy. Jasmine picked him up and placed him in his bed while Sky tucked him in so he could rest. They left the door open so they could hear him. Chichi was crying in the kitchen upset from Gohan's earlier episode. Jasmine ans Sky comforted her as everyone else was in conversation amoungst themselves about the situation.

**Thank you to all my reviewers.**

**The three of wands means help offered.**


	12. Chapter 12

Reading of dispair

Chapter twelve: Sun

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

Four years later

Gohan had been going to a phycaiatrist after his kemotherapy. So far everything was working out for him. He was beginning to feel better about his father. However, this did not change the way he felt about him. His heart was still broken from disappointment. But on the bright side Rose Jets understood him pretty well. For her father left her at the age of thirteen. Gohan never thought therapy would be so well, threaputic. He also learned some new stress managment techniqes to help him keep calm and stable moods. Things have been going well for the past four years and he was starting to behave more like his old self.

He and Sky were going to have a slumber party at her house. Gohan had finally earned Crystal and Robby's trust and Chichi also gave him the okay to stay the night. It was a friday night and Sky had the weekend to herself due to school being out. She was so excited to finally get her parents to trust Gohan she could barely contain herself. All though, they wouldn't have trusted Gohan if they knew what they did a year ago out in the forrest not too far from his house.

_Flashback_

_ Gohan and Sky were sitting together in front of the lake just as they always did on a saturday after noon. Their relationship had grown strong and the two seemed to be feeling a pull of emotion attatchment to each other. Sky was laying on Gohan's chest just listening to his heart beat just as he did at night when they were together. She rubbed his upper stomach being careful not to disturb the tube that was there. Gohan had gotten news from Doctor Reich that the kemotherapy was taking effect and the cancer cells were starting to deminnish. However, he was still a long ways from beating the cancer. He looked down at how peacful she seemed and stroked her golden blond hair. Sky glanced up at him with a smile._

_"So, what're you thinking about?" _

_"I got good news to tell you. The kemo is taking effect on my body and the cancer cells are beginning to deminnish. I'm still not out of the woods yet, but I'm keeping my faith that I'll get through it." Gohan informed with a sort of gentlness to his voice._

_"That's wonderful! Oh, your mother must be so happy!" Sky exclaimed as she wrapped her arms around him pulling him into an embrace._

_Just then a risqe thought had entered Sky's mind," Hey Gohan?"_

_"Yeah?" _

_"Well I was thinking, are we moving on to the next level?" Sky asked innocently._

_"The next level? Oh, you mean our relationship. Well whatever you wanna do. I don't want to rush you." Gohan replied kinda knowing where this was going. _

_ After all he wasn't in rut anymore and Sky wasn't in heat anymore either so he kinda went from clues on that. He jumped, startled when her fox tail wrapped around his. She leaned closer to him and locked lips with him. Her arms encircled his neck as she deepened the kiss. At first Gohan couldn't believe it. They've never had such an intimate kiss before. Sure they kissed but on the cheek or forehead. Gohan was caught off guard when she leaned in further pushing him on the ground. He didn't know what to make of it. His head felt fuzzy, his heart was pounding, and more importaintly, he begain to feel a little sturring in his crotch. She strattled his hips and pulled off his shirt._

_ She tossed it to the side as she gazed upon his body. The kemo didn't cause him or her to lose their hair, but Sky was superized to see that Gohan still retained his muscle mass. She smirked tracing the vallies of all his muscles on his body with her index finger. Sky glanced up at Gohan to see his face was flushed and she could see his heart beatting out of his chest. The truth was, Gohan was nervous as hell. After all it was his first time. He knew that sex created babies and where what goes where but it still confused the hell out of him. Where would he begain? His thoughts were cut off when he felt her nibbling on his neck. He shivered at the sudden contact as her hair tickled his face and chest._

_ She pulled herself back up to remove the tube top she wore that day esposing her breasts. In that moment Gohan's mind went blank. He'd seen a woman's bare breasts before, but only in a health text book. He never saw a real pair before, however Sky took the opertunity of Gohan's shocked gaze and unfastened his pants. She notice the straining erection he had as she freed it from the confines of his boxers. It sprang forth fully hard as she gasped in superize._

_"Damn! Do saiyan's normally have large penises?" Sky asked._

_Gohan stammered,"I dunno, I haven't seen anyone elses to compair size too."_

_ With that said Sky removed all his clothes untill he lay bare beneth her. He wasn't too sure if he should make a move yet. He was already nervous as it was and he didn't want to rush her. Gohan wanted to give her the control so she could stop in case she begain to feel uncomfortable. So he just laid there and le her do all the work. Sky then took this as a que to dispose of her clothes as well. Once she did Gohan couldn't tare his gaze away from her. She looked perfect. Fair skin tone, volupoius curves, and to his superize she favered shaving her intimate parts. Just then, a thought popped into his head. _

_"Wait! Do you have a condom on you?" Gohan remembered as he called it to her attention._

_"Yeah, I do"_

_"So, you were planning this weren't you?" Gohan asked, not that he minded though._

_"Yep, sure did!" She verified as she pulled one out of her discarded pants pocket._

_ And from that moment on the two made love all after noon long untill the sun begain to set. To Gohan it felt like being reborn again. He never expireanced anything like it. emotionally or physically. Gohan couldn't believe just a simple act could cause so many feelings to errupt in his heart, and they were all for her. Bliss, Pleasure, Happiness, Completion, Passion, and most importaintly Love. And it wasn't love like you tell someone "I love you" but more like an intense intimate love. The kind that left you breathless just thinking about it, or the kind that made your heart or stomach ache when you were away from that special someone for too long. They had been remarkably close sense that one little moment. But no one else knew about their love making except the two of them. _

_End of flashback_

Gohan smiled at the memory as he walked up to Sky's house and knocked on the door. Robby answered it and let him in. Gohan packed light so travel was easier. Robby sat on the couch with Gohan as he proceded to give him the "Father to boyfriend threat" (yeah, you all know what I'm talking about).

He turned to Gohan and simply stated," Alright, I have some rules. No making out, no sex, and more importaintly you sleep on the couch tonight. I don't want you to even think about popping my daughter's cherry and then splitting. Is that clear?" He fermly ordered.

"Okay, I can live with that." Gohan answered politely.

"Good, because from what I've seen you're a good kid. And I would hate to kick your ass if you hurt Sky." Robby warned.

"Alright sir. You have my word. The couch is my territory at bed time and no X rated stuff." Gohan replied with a smile.

With that said he went upstairs to see Sky and they spent the night just talking like they usually did. She showed him her latest drawings and even gave him a sketch pad she made just for him. It was decorated in all his favorite things in stickers and had all her dedicational work done for him. It was his birthday tonight so she wanted to make it extra special sense she's been working on it for at least a week. He loved it and promised to charish it for as long as he lived. Then when night fell, they watched a movie on the couch and fell asleep sitting up in each other's arms as Crystal covered them both up with a blanket before turning the Televison and DVD player off before going to bed. They both slept soundly as they both lie unawaire of the next morning's events.

**There you have it! I wanted to include a little lemon in there but not to explit. :D**

**Anyway thanks to my reviewers and untill next time.**

**The sun means Succses.**


	13. Chapter 13

Reading of dispair

Chapter thirteen: Ten of swords

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

The morning rays had peeked over the horizon and shined in the window closest to the couch. Sky and Gohan were sitting on the couch asleep together. The rays of sun had hit Gohan's face first sense he was closest to the window. He flinched as his eyes opened. Gohan's eyes made contact with the digital clock on the end table next to the couch. It was seven o'clock am. As soon as Gohan realized this he stretched as he let out a huge yawn. Sky was still clinging to Gohan with her arms around his waiste.

Gohan looked down at her and smiled. He leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead. But her forehead felt cold for some reason.

"Sky, time to wake up." Gohan whispered softly.

But there was no response from Sky. Gohan noticed this and looked closer. Her skin seemed paler than usual. The bluish viens in her skin were present. Gohan grabbed her and lifted her up. There was still no response. He begain to painic as he gently shook her, again no response. She lie still, stiff, and cold.

"Sky? Are you okay?" Gohan spoke a little louder in denial.

Still nothing. Gohan begain to hyperventilate. He laid her on the floor and checked for a heart beat and a pulse. He got nothing.

"NO NO NO NOOOO, SKY SAY SOMETHING ANYTHING, PLEASE!" Gohan screamed as he begain CPR.

Crystal and Robby awoke with a start. They heard Gohan's screams and knew something wasn't right. They put on their robes and dashed down the stairs to the living room. What they saw was Gohan screaming and crying for Sky to answer him as he tried to resesitate her. Crystal freaked, she ran to her daughter and grabbed her hand crying hystairically. Robby stood there in complete shock unable to move from the stair case. Gohan continued to cry, beg, and scream to the heavens as he tried desprately to save the girl he gave his heart and soul to.

It wasn't till seven thirty that the awful truth that it was too late sank in. Gohan couldn't save her lie he believed he could. Crystal cried harder as Robby walked over to them in a grief strikened daze.

"My...little girl...no." Robby muttered in dispair silently.

"NO, not you too Sky, I already lost mama! Not you too damn it!" Crystal cried hitting the carpet with a closed fist.

Gohan was in a daze himself, never moving from the spot he's been in sense he awoken to this devestating discovery. He lifted her up in his arms and held her close to his chest for as long as he could for as close as he could. He lifted his head up to the celling and sobbed.

"WHY? NO SKY DON'T LEAVE ME, PLEASE! OH GOD NO! EVERYONE I LOVE DIES OR LEAVES ME NOT YOU TOO!" He continued to scream.

About eight o'clock am, Robby made all the calls to Gohan's friends, family, and the morgue. He placed the phone on the reciver and walked slowly back into the living roon dreading to see his little girl dead on the shag carpeting. Gohan was still hystarical and holding Sky. He wouldn't let anyone come near her let alone take her from him. His and his wife's cries hadn't stopped yet. He stayed with them until a knock sounded at the door. Robby rose from the floor and answered the door. The first of Gohan's family and friends to arrive was Chichi and Piccolo.

"What happened Robby? Why'd you call us over here?" Chichi questioned feeling in her heart that something was terrorabley wrong.

He sighed as he let them in before he finaly spoke,"It's Sky Mrs. Son, she...," He struggled to speak but the words didn't make it out.

Then Chichi and Piccolo heard the screaming. They looked at each other and with out further ado ran to the living room where they heard it coming from. There, they seen Gohan crying hystarically and holding Sky's dead corpse. But that wasn't all, he was bleeding from all the emotional stress. Blood was seepping from his nose and mouth as his cries became labored and gruggly. Chichi and Piccolo noticed he was in super saiyan two. They tried to go over to him to comfort him but Crystal stopped them. They looked at her confused as she told him what was going on.

"Don't, when we tried to go to him he did this strange transformation and it blew us away. He won't let anyone come near him or Sky." She explained.

"But we can't leave him lie that! His health is in danger! He could be damaged from the stress he's going through right now!" Chichi remarked panic strickened.

"What are we supose to do then! Let him bleed to death?" Piccolo snapped.

Just then the sirens of the paramedics sounded in the drive way as they came rushing into the house. As they saw Gohan they froze at the sight. No one dared to move until Jasmine came through the door. She noticed Gohan had his gaurd down which to her advantage made her realize that the idea she had would work perfectly. She had gotten the call from Robby about Sky and Gohan's behavior. He clearly stated that Gohan was out of control with grief. That was when she planed to bring her Moshi nagent (Sniper rifle that shoots tranqulizer rounds) with her.

She renforced the trank darts to withstand saiyan strenght. She took aim at Gohan's neck through the scope and adgusted the magnafacation. She took a deep breath holding it as she waited paitently for his movements to cease. Jasmine was greatful for her expireance in the military for it would come in handy. She was a lot of things in that field of work. One of those things was a sniper. If she wasn't on medic parachute then she was on infiltration or sniper duty. Once Gohan's movements ceased for a split second that was all she needed to pull the triger.

A loud bang and clicking sound was heard as it ecohed in the house. Everyone, Chichi, Piccolo, Sky's parents, and the paramedics shot a look in the door way were Jasmine stood pulling the lever back on the rifle. They didn't even know she came in. She was as stealthy as a snake in the grass sneaking around at night. The dart hit home as it was lodged in Gohan's neck. However, he didn't feel it. But he felt the pull of unconciousness as it took him to a deep eight hour sleep. He dropped to the ground on his side still holding Sky's dead body in his arms. Jasmine raised her hand in athority.

"Alright, he's out! Do your thing! Go Go Go!" Jasmine shouted.

The paramedics wasted no time as they quickly did their job.

"What the hell was that Jasmine! You didn't have to kill him!" Chichi cried.

"Relax Chichi. I didn't kill him and besides, you'd think I'd do such a thing to my favorite little guy? I only tranquilized him. I used my moshi nagant rifle. It only fires tranquiling rounds." Jasmine defended.

"She's right, if we left Gohan like that there's no telling what might have happened." Piccolo agreed.

Two hours had passed, and the paramedics had done their job and got Sky's body to the morgue. Gohan was taken to the emergancy room. Everyone else fallowed.

At the hospital, Gohan laid in bed getting a blood transfusion. He had just came out of surgery. The emotional stress caused so much damage to his stomach that it aggervated the cancer and it caused his stomach to tare and bleed profusly. He was reciveing five bags of blood. As Gohan was in the ICU (Intensive care unit) his mother and friends were there with him. He didn't make a sound, he was too doped up from the anisthesia and pain killers that he didn't even register anything around him. Everyone was in silence as they were vigilant of Gohan's presence.

A knock sounded at the door and everyone had sensed who it was. Jasmine noticed everyone on edge and had a hint of happiness to thier facial features. Jasmine took this as a que to rise out of her chair and answer the door. And to her superize Goku was standing on the other side.

**There, Now it's gonna get interesting.**

**Thank you to all my reviewers.**

**The ten of swords means ruin and dispair.**

**Till next time.**


	14. Chapter 14

Reading of dispair

Chapter fourteen: King of wands

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT

As Goku stood in the door way Jasmine was shocked. She didn't know what to think at that moment. Here was Goku in the flesh and alive no less and shows up four years later. Jasmine wanted to back hand him for making such a foolish decision but, decided with better judgment that now was not the time or place. There was an eerie silence that hung over them like a guilitine ready to drop and cut their heads off. The truth was, she had no idea what to say. Then Goku was the first to break the deathly silence.

"Hey Jaz, long time no see." He spoke in his normal cheery voice.

"Hey Goku! How'd you get back?" Krillin asked excitedly.

Jasmine was still silent because deep down she knew exactly what was going to happen. Even though Gohan was knocked out cold, he wouldn't be emotional or mentally stable enough for any stress. She was on edge as she stepped aside to let Goku into the room. He stopped at Gohan's bed and gazed upon him with a look of worry and concern. Gohan just laid there, motionless and asleep. At that moment everyone just wanted to tackle Goku to welcome him back, but given the circumstanses they were all silent and still. Goku looked up and turned to everyone else.

"I was granted a life back. King Kai told me to go back to earth. He sensed something wrong with my family for the past four years."

"Really? That's great man!" Yamcha exclaimed.

Jasmine wasn't pleased though but decided to cuss him out later sense this wasn't the right moment for it. She had a little more sense than that. As the hours passed, everyone spent time filling Goku in on what happened the last four years. Needless to say, he was shocked that Gohan and Chichi had been through so much pain. He didn't think his decision was going to cause so much anguish. Then a knock sounded at the door. Doctor Reich and Doctor Roebuck walked in with their clip boards in tow. Everyone's attention was turned towards them in an instant.

"Gohan will be fine. As you can all see he made it through the surgery without any complications. However, due to all the damage he's suffered from the last episode he had we are going to keep him for the next week to give him physical threapy." Roebuck informed.

"But, there is some bad news. Gohan's mental instabillity is shot. We're also keeping him on suicide watch just in case. And he will have manditory daily visits with Doctor Rose Jets. He will be held in the Anchor town mental institution. It's on the same place as the ER you'll just have to take this hall all the way to the end and turn right to the main desk in the mental ward." Reich replied.

"Oh, Gohan!" Chichi cried as she held Gohan's hand.

"But, Gohan isn't suicidal." Jasmine noted.

"Yes, but due to his mental instability we're just taking a precaution. He could turn suicidal. And sense he's still a minor we're placing him on suicide watch." Roebuck replied.

"How long will he be in the asaine asylum for?" Goku asked.

"Untill we see improvement or for the whole week he's here. Which ever happens first." Roebuck answered.

Everyone's moods went down hill. They all conversated amongst themselves as Gohan slept peacfully. As the clock stroke ten o'clock pm, everyone bid Gohan goodbye and left for home. Of course, Gohan was too drugged up at the time to even notice Goku was back. Piccolo had left a little brown pouch with senzu beans in it with a note to Gohan on the side table when he woke up and was in his right mind.

Once Goku and Chichi returned home they sat at the dinner table and talked about Gohan. Chichi told him through tears everything that had happened to him. Goku sat there stunned as he listened. It broke his heart to hear such an awful story. After about three hours of explaining Chichi had cooked Goku dinner and they went to bed. But Goku's thoughts were on Gohan. He couldn't sleep knowing what happened to him. Chichi however cried herself to sleep in Goku's arms as he still lie awake.

One week later

Gohan was ready to come home. But this doesn't mean he was happy about it. In fact he was dreading it. He was still morning the death of his girlfriend and he still cried over her. He often flipped through the sketch book she gave him for his birthday. Sky's parents Robby and Crystal still kept in contact with him. Gohan like this though, he wanted to help them just like they wanted to help him. Everyone would visit Gohan in the mental ward as well. He was distant toward all of them. Sometimes when they came to see Gohan, he would be either crying as he flipped through the sketch book Sky gave him or sitting on his bed rocking back and fourth without a response.

He was a real emotional reck. And to be honest, he neglected himself. His hair was a nappy mess, his stunk of BO, and his skin was pale with dark rings around his eyes. He also refused to eat. Not only that but the suicide watch sucked. He couldn't do much, he couldn't go for a walk, shower by himself, or sleep in peace. The man sat in the corner reading a book watching Gohan like a hawk, almost daring him to do something stupid. He was assigned as Gohan's suicide watcher. It freaked Gohan out to no end being watched like that.

As he walked outside to sit on the bentch waiting for his family to pick him up he couldn't help but feel sick. He would have to deal with his father. An aggervated sigh escaped his lips as he recalled an incident in the visitation lounge in the mental ward.

_Flashback_

_ It was the second day in the mental ward that Gohan was assigned to. He was on his bed crying his eyes out because he woke up from another dream about Sky. Usually Gohan would cry because he felt hopeless. He missed Sky and needed her badly. His heart felt like it was being crushed in the cold steel like grip of death. It was agonizing and painful for him to adjust. There were times he'd go completely insane and have to be sedated to be kept under control. The pain he felt both physically and emotionally wore him thin every day. Until two o'clock pm he was notified that he had a visitor._

_ He decided to take it and was escorted down to the visitation lounge. Then, that's were it all begain. He saw Golu sitting there waiting for him, Gohan let a growl out as he sat down in the chair across from Goku at the table._

_"Hey son, how're you doing?" Goku asked gently._

_ Goku had an idea of how Gohan felt about him. So he tried to smooth things out with him._

_"How do you think? You left me to be ravaged by cancer!" Gohan snapped._

_"Gohan, I just want to help. I wanna make it better." Goku tried to convince his son._

_"Make it better? Ha! Like you even know how to do that. How the hell do you expect to do that when you have no clue what I've been through? I don't know what's worse, the fact that you run away from your responsibilities or the fact that you had a bullshit excuse for doing it." Gohan blandly stated._

_This hit a nerve in Goku,"I never abandoned you or your mother! I did it to protect the earth." Goku exclaimed in anger._

_"Yeah whatever, That's the shit I'm talking about right there! That bullshit excuse! I killed Cell, the earth was no longer in danger. You should've came back, you had other responsibilites besides that. Like being a father and a husband. The planet doesn't need us until some crazy bastard decides to fuck with it." Gohan angerly stated._

_"Gohan, I know that! Show some respect, I'm your father!" Goku yelled._

_"Yeah, for how long? All you did when you were around was eat, train, and sleep._ _Would've it killed you to actually make time for us? And one more thing, mom did the majority of the raising part. She's also pissed at you!" He shot back._

_"What is wrong with you? You use to be such a good kid. Now you're just being selfish and disrespectful!" Goku noted with angry athority._

_"Disrespectful and selfish? You're the one who disrespected this family by leaving the way you did and as for selfish? Agh, YOU'RE the selfish one for only caring about your trainning, fighting, and challenges. The challenge was here, your family having a crisis!" Gohan eclaimed as he pointed down at the table._

_"I did what I could to protect you guys!" Goku shouted back._

_"In the process of ignoring us!"_

_"I did NOT ignore you two!" Goku yelled his adrenaline pumping through his viens._

_ Gohan shot up out of his chair and yelled with all his strengh, his fists clintched at his sides._

_ "YOU...NEGLECTFUL...SELFISH...BASTARD!" Gohan yelled venom lasing every word._

_ Then, Goku snapped and slapped Gohan across the face._

_"I'm done. You will not speak to me that way!" _

_ Gohan laid there trying to get up as the nurse who was in the room at the time pressed the emergancy button to get security down there. Security took Gohan back to his room and escorted Goku out of the building._

_End of flashback_

Gohan sighed in regret. He didn't mean to lose it the way he did. But Goku didn't have to slap him like that when he was in a weakened state. He was sure he was going to be in for it when he got home from his mother or Aunt Jaz. Just then Piccolo came flying in and he landed in front of him. Gohan looked superized to see Piccolo here to come get him, but something on his face had Gohan concerned.

"What's wrong PIccolo?"

Piccolo didn't respond as he grabbed Gohan's wrist and flew off with him in tow. Gohan was puzzled as he asked Piccolo what happened.

"It's your father Gohan. Something happened to him!" Piccolo exclaimed.

**What will happen next! **

**Any way thanks to my reviewers**

**The King of wands means Man of authority**


	15. Chapter 15

Reading of dispair

Chapter fifteen: Tower

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

Piccolo and Gohan had flown at speeds faster that lightening to get to Jasmine's house. For some odd reason, Gohan sensed his father's energy was incredibly low. He couldn't help but notice that something wasn't right. Another thing that bugged him was why it was at Aunt Jaz's house. He looked over at Piccolo and decided to break the ice.

"What in the world happened?" He asked a little confused, worry evident in his voice.

Piccolo glanced at Gohan and answered," I don't know, but whatever it is, it can't be good if Jasmine called your mother telling her to get me to pick you up as soon as posible."

"Did she even tell you what it was?" Gohan questioned.

"She only told me it was about your father and told me to bring you there. Your mother is waiting for you there too." Piccolo informed with a bit of urgency.

"Then it can't be good. What could've happened?" Gohan wondered as Jasmine's house came into view.

They seen the small condo and landed in the front door step. Gohan knocked on the door and immediatly Jasmine anwered it. She said nothing as she let them in motioning that they sit on the couch. Chichi was there silently crying and completely in the dark about what happened only a few hours ago. When everyone was seated Jasmine took her seat in the chair on the left side of the living room. She sat there for a moment and took a deep breath to calm and compose herself.

"I'm so pissed off right now it isn't even funny." She stated in a bland and irritated voice with her hands clasped over her knee.

"What happened Aunt Jaz?" Gohan asked nervously.

Gohan knew out of all the years he's been around Jasmine that when she uses the line she had just used then the news was'n't very good at all. Jasmine took another moment to compose herself. She sat up with a sigh and decided to speak once again. The room was full of tension. Piccolo and Chichi knew that it hadn't been this intense sense they all found out that Gohan had cancer.

"I talked to your father about what happened during his visit with you in the mental ward the day he came back. He didn't want to go home just yet because he was pissed. I didn't know what about so we sat down and talked about it before he went home to your mother." Jasmine explained.

"I'm sorry I acted the way I did Aunt Jaz. I was just so angry with him." Gohan apologized remoresfully.

"I agree with you on that but, I knew it would happen. He seen me the day before he decided to visit you. I warned him that you were not mentally or emotionally stable yet and could become hostile. But he didn't listen and went the day after. When he came over after his visit he told me what happened. I told him to let you recover for now and talk to you when you returned home when you're more stable." Jasmine explained.

"But what happened just now?" Chichi asked feeling the anticipation.

"I was getting to that." Jasmine noted calmly.

Jasmine continued," Well I did give him one of my "act like you have some damn sense" speeches. But that was after he told me he slapped you. He got upset and started crying. After he calmed down, he went home to tell your mother about it."

"He did? Mom, you must be mad at me." Gohan stated with a shaky voice.

"Well, I'm not happy with you for disrespecting your father but I told him about the cancer and how fragile you've become. I was more upset that he hit you when you were emotionally unstable. He should've been the adult about it and left." Chichi clarified.

"I know mom, but I wasn't myself. I just don't condone what he did that's all. Something like this doesn't go away over night." Gohan informed.

"He's right about that Chichi. This is gonna take a lot of work to clear up. Plus I need to finish the story on what just recently happened." Jasmine agreed.

_Flashback_

_ It was a tuesday morning and Jasmine just had a girls night with Chichi to help her take her mind off her worries. But what they didn't know was Goku had went to see Gohan again to see if he could talk to him again. However, the next visit was just the same as the last as he left this time instead of being rash like last time at the last visit. Goku felt heart broken that Gohan didn't seem to want to patch things up with him. But then that's when he begain to feel guilty about everything in his life. Then his thoughts went back to the Cell games._

_ He knew he shouldn't have put Gohan in that kind of danger. Goku let a few stray tears fall from his eyes as he remembered Gohan at the mental ward. Gohan spilled everything about how he felt and what he really thought of Goku and him placing him in that situation. Goku cried the whole way there to Jasmine's place and walked in. He had a key to the condo that Jasmine gave him. She was planing on giving Gohan one when he got out of the hospital. _

_ He sat on her couch and cried with his face in his hands. Truth was, he felt like a bad father and he also felt even worse hitting Gohan at the first visit knowing he was too fragile to defend himself. Then a horrible idea snuck it's way into his mind. So he decided to go with it, even if he knew it was wrong. He came to a choice as he got up from the couch and walked into the bathroom. Goku knew what he wanted to do but he would need a little something less painful to do the job. _

_ Once he was in the bathroom he opened the medicine cabanent to reveal the many medicines inside. Some were over the counter and the three orange bottles were Jasmine's perscriptions. He knew Jasmine was on perscription pills for her medical issues. As he pondered a thought on should he really do this he shoved it aside and pulled out the bottles of pills. After setting them on the sink he checked the miligrams on each medicine to see which was stronger. He placed the other two back and closed the medicine cabanant and then sat on the floor. _

_ Goku leaned his head against the tile wall and sighed holding a bottle of Jasmine's heart medicine._

_"__**I hurt Gohan so much. I knew I shouldn't of put him through so much as a child. I dumped way too much responsibility on him and it gave him cancer and killed his unborn sibling. I'm the worst father I can think of. Gohan could've been killed that day and he could've died from that cancer too. I should've been there, and now he hates me. I guess it's time for me to go. I don't want to hang around and hurt him or Chichi anymore." He thought sorrowfully as he uncapped the bottle swallowing all thirty pills.**_

_He sat there waiting for the over dose to kill him when suddenly the bathroom door opened. Jasmine had came home and went to put her new things she bought away when she seen Goku on the floor. She placed her things on the bathroom sink and kneeled down._

_"Goku, what're you doing on my bathroom floor?" Jasmine asked a little suspisious._

_Goku looked up at her with hazy eyes,"I'm ending it." He replied in a tired pain strickened voice._

_"What're you talking about? Ending what, what did you do?" Jasmine aksed in a desperate tone._

_ Then that was when Goku tossed her the new perscription pill bottle for her heart medicine and it was empty. Jasmne picked it up and gasped._

_"Please tell me YOU didn't take all these! Goku?" Jasmine yelled._

_ Goku didn't answer as he slumped to the side now feeling the efects of the pills. Jasmine freaked as she dropped to the floor to check him. His eyes were glazed over and the pupils were dialated, his heart beat was slowing down, and his breathing was becoming shorter. She cursed as she took him down stairs to her basement where she set up her home med wing two days ago to pump his stomach._

_End of flashback_

After Jasmine told the horrible tale of Goku's almost succseful suicide everyone was in complete shock and denial. Gohan couldn't believe it, he made Goku feel so guilty the second time he visited him in the hospital that he actually tried to kill himself.

"After I pumped his stomach and stablized him I talked to him when he regained consciousness. I couldn't believe he would do something so reckless like this. Luckily he understood what he did was just plain stupid and he broke down. He cried himself to sleep." Jasmine explained in a saddened tone.

Just then Chichi passed out and Gohan started crying himself.  
"It's all my fault! I shouldn't have made him feel so bad. I thought he would understand. But it just made him try to commit suicide!" Gohan sobbed.

"No, Gohan this isn't your fault. You told me you didn't explode the last time you talked to him and you explained why you felt the way you did. He should've waited untill everything calmed down first." Jasmine consoled.

"Where is he now?" Gohan asked quicky as his puls picked up.

"He's in the guest room to your right. The first one you come to."

"Thank you, I'm going to see him. I didn't want him to kill himself. I just wanted him to know the damage he's done." Gohan stated as he ran to that room.

Once he came in he saw him. Goku was laying on the bed with an IV in his arm and a breathing mask over his face. Gohan slowly walked over to his father and sat on the chair next to him. Gohan cried as he sat there wondering what he did to desurve all this.

**Damn! Didn't expect that now did ya?**

**Thank you to my reviewers:D**

**The tower means conflict.**


	16. Chapter 16

Reading of dispair

Chapter sixteen: Judgement

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

Gohan sat in the arm chair next to Goku for what seemed like hours. When in reality it had only been thirty minutes. Jasmine had periodically checked on them to makes sure they were okay. However, Chichi was passed out on the couch still and Piccolo kept vigilant of the situation. Gohan's heart ached with imence sorrow from all that had transpired in his life. The Cell games, Goku leaving, finding out he had cancer, the miscarrage, Sky's death, having yet another surgery, being in the asaine asylum, the two arguments he had with his father, and now the curren situation, his father tried to commit suicide. He looked at his father's peacful sleeping face as he remembered all of the pain. His stomach begain to feel upset as he hadn't eaten anything sense he left the hospital.

It was noon, and Gohan hadn't a clue what to do next. He felt remorse for what he said at the hospital when Goku came back for another visit. He sat back in the chair as he closed his eyes recalling the memory.

_Flashback_

_ Gohan had been called down to the visitation room again. It was his last night there and so far, everyone had come to visit. He was feeling much better than what he had been but, no where near how he wanted to feel. He still shead tears over his lost sibling and Sky but he ruffed it out. So far he was feeling pretty decent. However, he didn't know who was coming to visit this time. Gohan sat in the chair at the table in the middle of the room waiting paitently for his guest. The door opened and to his superize Goku came walking in. He took a seat across from Gohan. There was an impenitrable silence before Goku spoke._

_"Gohan, I want to fix things between us. I just wanted to say I'm sorry for hitting you the last time I was here. I just want you to feel better that's all. Tell me, what all have you been through?" He asked sencerilly._

_"Simple, you left and came back four years later and expected to have my undying love and respect when you know damn well you lost it and don't deserve it. But that isn't all, when you were alive after you came back from Yardrat you ignored mom and me like hell to go train. For god's sake you wouldn't even touch her anymore. You basically neglected both of us! Not only that but I went into that hyperbolic time chamber to spend time with you during our trainning because I knew I was needed and for the most part I wouldn't be able to even see you at all sense all you ever did was train. Then the Cell games happened and I was stuck cleaning up your mess. For crying out loud, I have horrible nightmares and flash backs from it. Also I hear voices at night and get little to no sleep. Then after I killed Cell you could've came back but didn't, that's when I snapped and decided I had had enough!" Gohan calmly exclaimed while trying to keep his cool. He did not want a repeat of last time._

_ Goku sat there dumbfounded. If he knew that was how he felt, then he wouldn't have put so much pressure on him. He sat up never losing eye contact with him as he spoke._

_"I'm sorry, I realized after Jaz told me the other night after my first time here I shouldn't have done that. She, your mother, and Piccolo laid into me hard after I returned and told them everything." Goku informed feeling nothing but guilt._

_"I'm just getting started," Gohan continued as he sat up to relife the pressure on his tube," Then with you unneccissarily gone you stressed me out so bad that I ended up with Calife stomach cancer at eleven. Then two months later mom miscarried your second child because of the stress of me having cancer and you being gone. She would've been better off with you there to help her. While that was happening your tournament money ran out putting us into a financally tight spot. I had to get a job to suport us. I was working, taking care of mom, and helping around the house while I had cancer! You could've done all that but didn't, but I an eleven year old child with cancer can do all that were as a grown man at full health can't? That's pathedic in my opinion! Not only that I lost my girlfriend to the same cancer I have just recently. I could've use your help with those things and you weren't there!" Gohan replied sorrowfully._

_"I had no idea that my choice would cause so much pain." Goku responded with his hand over his mouth. He swallowed a huge lump in his throat as he resisted the urge to cry._

_"Yeah well ,it did. A lot of unneeded pain. Do you have any idea what it's like to have a needle jammed in your arm twice a week to test your blood? How about having one in your arm that releases radiation in your body to kill cancer cells inside of you? What about throwing up blood, pissing blood, and let's not forget shitting blood all the time. I cough and sneeze up blood occationally and have horrific chest and stomach pains so bad that I can't even get up in the morning. How about having to ware a damn diper at fifteen years old because you get so weak sometimes that you can't make it to the toilet on time? And try Having to feel like you're defenceless or going to die all the time every day of your life? And let's not even go there about the medicine I take. I have to drink a nasty medicine shake before I eat to keep my stomach from bleeding while I'm eatting. I have to be on a strict diet because of this. Not only that most of my favoriate foods I had to cut out of that diet. Sometimes I throw up unanounced and don't even feel it coming untill it just spews out. Then I also have to drink a special tea to calm my nausia so I don't vomit and I have a tube surgically embeded into my stomach. Do you know what the tube is for? It's for when I have to give myself a pain shot via needle. I have to put the needle in the tube so the syrum gets to the right place in my stomach. Then I have to change the tube once a week. While I change the tube people have to stand at least ten feet away from me so I don't get an airborne bactirial infection. I can't train anymore, I can't swim unless I go to an indoor pool. Even then I have to ware a special bandage over the tube because it could get infected if I get water in it. And on top of all that, I have PTSD (Post trumatic stress disorder) that causes me to have flash backs, nightmares, and hear voices. I'm so fucked up metally that I have to see a phycaiatrist every week. For god's sake, the only time I get any decent sleep is when I take my injection and it puts me out because the medicine is so potent. So, tell me. How would you think you'd handle that?"_

_ Goku sat there with a look of pain and saddness on his face. He couldn't believe Gohan had expireanced so much pain. He wanted to be there for him but he knew he wasn't and that's what hurt Gohan the most. Then the thing that made Goku lose it entirely happened. Gohan begain to cry out his pain._

_"Damn it, how could you? I needed you and you weren't there! You weren't there and I tainted my own soul hating you! Just like Aunt Jaz said I would! I should've listened to her! I should've listened, hero worship IS unhealthy but I did it anyway! I even played favoriates with you and mom! I sat there and favored you over her and it wasn't fair to her! I never asked much from you but, I needed a father not a hero or a teacher." Gohan sobbed with his head in his arms on the table._

_ Goku didn't know how to react except cry as he heard Gohan's shocking revealation. He left the place to go to Jasmine's house. _

_End of flashback._

Gohan sighed in defeat at the memory. He didn't expect this all to happen. Just then a sound caught his attention. He looked across the room to see a small radio on the table. Someone left it on but, the volume was low. But due to his saiyan hearing he could hear it perfectly. It was playing a song he often listened to when Sky sang it. She said it reminded her of everything Gohan told her about how he felt about his father. He listened to it and it brought him back to the time were she would take him to Allia's carioke dinner.

**Somebody once told me that pain is a game we all gotta play.**

**Then why am I in over time and sudden death every other day?**

**I know before the good in life there's a price we all gotta pay.**

**But I'll pay till I'm poor and still don't know what it is to have a good day.**

**Sense everybody knows what it is I need do.**

**Well do me a favor.**

**Let me worry 'bout me and you worry 'bout you.**

**I don't need no one to put me down no more.**

**The ground can't get no lower.**

**And I don't need no one to hang around and make me frown.**

**It just makes me look older.**

**And I don't need no one to black my eyes and tell me lies.**

**Don't wanna cry over nobody else no no no.**

**I can do bad all by myself.**

**Somebody once told me that runnin' from the rain don't make no sense.**

**I've had my own dark cloud for a while now.**

**And it fallows where ever I'm goin' yeah.**

**They're tellin' me that the grass is much greener on the other side.**

**Well I don't wanna take a chance on dirt.**

**When I got grass.**

**Even though the grass has died.**

**Sense everyone knows what it is I need to do.**

**Well do me a favor.**

**Let me worry 'bout me and you worry 'bout you.**

**I don't need no one to put me down no more.**

**The ground can't get no lower.**

**And I don't need no one to hang around and make me frown.**

**It just makes me look older.**

**And I don't need no one to black my eyes and tell me lies.**

**Don't wanna cry over nobody else no no no.**

**I can do bad,**

**Don't waste time feeling bad for me.**

**I didn't ask you for your sympathy.**

**I know someone's watching over me.**

**So I guess this is where I'm supose to be.**

**I don't need no one to put me down no more.**

**The ground can't get no lower.**

**And I don't need no one to hang around and make me frown.**

**It just makes me look older.**

**And I don't need no one to black my eyes and tell me lies.**

**Don't wanna cry over over over nobody else.**

**'Cause I can do bad, all by myself.**

As soon as the song ended Goku started to awake from his deep sleep. He looked around at his surroundings and spotted Gohan. They locked eyes for a moment, but neither had the courage to speek to the other.

**What will happen next?**

**Thank you to my reviewers!**

**The judgement card means awakening or renewal.**

**The song that I used in this fic was called "I can do bad all by myself" by Mary J Blige. **

**Check it out on youtube Schubskie.**

**I'm a big Tyler Perry fan and the song was on his movie.**

**I can do bad all by myself. **

**Till next time:D**


	17. Chapter 17

Reading of dispair

Chapter seventeen: Five of cups

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

The silence was unnerving. Even in that large guest room, it felt stiffling and small to Gohan. He looked into his father's half lidded eyes as they stared back at him. They still looked glazed over and cloudy as if they lacked life. Like the eyes of a dead man. He didn't know what to say to Goku, he just sat there like a deer in the head lights. After about fifteen minutes Goku finaly spoke.

"G...Gohan?" He managed to rasp but was weak from the over dose.

"Yeah, I'm right hear." Gohan whispered not knowing what els to say.

Goku's hand slowly but weakly reached up as if trying to grasp something. Gohan felt like he knew what he wanted and reached over to grab it. It had been a long time sense he held his father's hand. He felt such regret when he cussed him out at the hospital. Gohan closed his eyes feeling the guilt build up.

"Gohan, I'm sorry. I should've helped. I should've raised you more than I did. I should've loved you more than I did. I'm so sorry. You didn't do anything to desreve this." Goku whipered raspily.

Goku begain to cry, silently this time. It was shocking for Gohan to see him cry like this. A few tears ran from Goku's eyes as he kept eye contact with Gohan. His heart ached with regret so terribly he didn't think he could stand it. But before he could continue, Gohan spoke up.

"Why? Why did you do it?" Gohan asked in a strained but sorrowful voice.

"I caused so much pain, I may not have ment it but I don't deserve to live anymore. Espeically after what I did to you and your mother." Goku whispered regretfully.

Gohan couldn't believe this. His father was actually considering suicide as a way out. He was just giving up again just like he did before.

"So suicide is the answer? For god's sake Dad it's not! You're just giving up like you did after the Cell games! Wasn't that suicide as well? Choosing not to come back? I think it is. You're just running away from your problems and responsibilities. That is the true definition of a coward! A real man is supose to face his own problems and take care of his responsibilities. Didn't anyone teach you that? Dying is not the answer to anything. Why do you think I'm alive? It's because I didn't choose death, I chose to live." Gohan replied dissapointed.

"I wasn't tought very many things on being a good father. I never had that in life. I'm sorry, but after I let everything sink in I just don't wanna live anymore. I didn't even love you properly. I realized I took one of the most precious things in life for granted." Goku sniffed still letting the tears fall.

"Look, I'm livid and disapointed in you. But that doesn't mean I wanted you to kill yourself. All you had to do was give me time. If you would've succeded, then you would've lost all hope of ever fixing things with us. And I will not forgive a coward let alone respect one. Which leads me to believe that there was another reason why you chose to stay gone besides the planet's safty. Why did you really do it?" Gohan asked with a hint of anger.

Goku didn't know how to say it. He couldn't tell Gohan his secret. He would hate him even more. And that, was the last thing he wanted. He just wanted Gohan to love him again. He turned his head to the side and didn't respond. He begain to sob lightly as he hid from his son, too ashamed of what he had already done. Gohan got impaitent.

"So what, you're just going to run again? I came here because I felt responsible for you trying to commit suicide and you can't even answer my question? Stop running and face up will you! I'm tired of all this ghetto drama between you and me! If you want anything to change for the better between us then confess or I'll just leave. The call is yours to make. If you loved me or mom, then you'll do what's right. You've already caused enough unneeded shit as it is. Let's put a stop to it today. Things probably won't be the same as they were before but it's better than fighting all the time. There's other things in life besides fighting and I learned that from the love of my life." Gohan pushed trying to get Goku to open up.

Goku was amazed. He couldn't believe his own son just said that. That was when he realized that he made Gohan grow up way too fast. Slowly without turning his head he finally answered.

"You had a girlfriend?"

"Yes, her name was Sky. She was the girl I gave my heart and soul to. I even gave her my virginity just as she gave me hers,"Gohan choked as he continued his tale. " She died two weeks ago from the same cancer I have. She died when I spent the night at her house. I woke up to her cold dead corpse holding on to me. Could you imagine waking up to mom that way?"

"No, I couldn't. And...wait," Goku's head snapped back into Gohan's direction," You two had sex?" Goku exclaimed in shock.

Gohan's cheeks flushed," No, we made love! And yes, we used a condom every time. It happened when we were Fourteen." Gohan blurted out embarrassed.

Goku was shocked. He couldn't believe his little boy just lost his virginity. Just the thought alone of Gohan doing the deed was enough to make him fall on his ass if he could. Gohan was also shocked. He couldn't believe he was talking to his own father about sex. For god's sake, Vegeta gave him the sex talk!

" I can't believe I missed that. I wish I would've talked to you about sex. You must have been so confused." Goku stated drying his tears.

" No, not exactly. Vegeta explained what happens to saiyan boys during adolesence and yes, he gave me the old sex talk in well, very vivid detail." Gohan answered as he shuddeered.

" Vegeta did that? I guess he beat me at something after all. Not that I was in compatition with him or anything." Goku sighed in defeat.

"Don't worry, Sky and I kept track of her monthlies and my ruts so just in case the condom broke we wouldn't risk pregnancy. She wasn't healthy enough for a baby." Gohan replied.

"I didn't think so. Not with cancer." Goku stated.

"All though, we were greatful we did keep track of that. After all there was this one time the condom broke and we didn't know it till I pulled out. To be honest with you I should've known something wasn't right when it started feeling better than it usually did." Gohan mummble in embarrassment.

"! NO WAY! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SAID THAT! !" Goku laughed trying to catch his breath.

Gohan's cheeks flushed as he clitched his fists," That's not funny dad!" He exclaimed.

"Yeah you're right it's not funny, it's freakin' histarical HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!" Goku smarted off.

"Damn it! I came in here to have a conversation with you to end the drama and you laugh!" Gohan stated aggervated.

"I'm sorry. I just couldn't help it." Goku apologized.

"Anyway you didn't answer my question. What was the other reason you stayed dead?" Gohan asked changing the topic.

Goku went silent before taking a deep breath,"I need to know before I answer that. Will you hate me because of this secret?"

"I don't know. Was it because you hated me for you having to teleport Cell off the planet causing your death or was you disapointed in me for not finishing him when you told me to?" Gohan asked feeling guilty.

"Gohan, my death wasn't your fault. I can already tell you're blaming yourself for it so stop that!" Goku demanded.

"How can I not feel guilty? I wanna know the truth. Did you stay in other world and use the planet's safty as a cover up to the real reason or was it because of this so called secret? I think mom and I desureve to know! I went around believing you hated me for your death and stayed dead out of shame and disapointment of me!" Gohan exclaimed trying to suppress the urge to cry.

He was beginning to tremble from the urge to cry coming along. The anticipation was killing him. Gohan just had to know! Goku looked at him in total shock. He couldn't believe Gohan felt that way.

"Gohan, I never hated you for that. You just had a moment of weekness. We all have them it's nothing to be ashamed of." Goku soothed trying to keep Gohan calm.

"I just have to know! The truth sets people free. Just set me free damn it! No matter how bad it hurts me!" Gohan cried.

"Gohan, this isn't easy for me to say. I knew how much you idolized me when you were younger and so I hid the truth from you because I was afriad you'd be disapointed in me and eventually hate me for it. That's been my biggest fear for years. To have you hate me. The secret is...I never knew how to be a good father. I never had anyone teach me. I was all alone for the most of my childhood after grampa Gohan died. Hell, I didn't even know what sex was until I married your mother. Then when she told me she was preganant I didn't even know what that ment either. Come to think of it, I've never seen an infant before until you were born. After your birth I was so lost. There was that time I tried to hold you when you were a baby and almost dropped you. I had no idea you were so fragile back then. Then there was the time I over fead you when you were a year old and it made you sick. I felt so bad for that. Slowly over time I finally admited to myself that I would never be a good father and just let your mother care for you untill you were older. For crying out loud I even left you unattended on the couch one day and you rolled off and hit the floor! I painiced! Luckily you were okay. I didn't trust myself around you until you were at least three! The whole reason why I wanted you to get out there and enjoy life was because I didn't want you to grow up clueless and stupid like me!" Goku ranted on as he burst into tears.

Gohan's eyes widened as he listened to everything. His heart clintched in pain as his father made that startling confession. He didn't know what to say to that. But it wasn't done there, Goku was just getting started.

"And, and...the reason why I stayed gone was because I felt so guilty for making you fight Cell that I didn't think I desureved you anymore. I put an eleven year old child, MY eleven year old child in horrible danger! I should've trained harder than what I did. So I could defeat Cell and come home to you and your mother. I felt ashamed that I used you as a tool a weapon to do MY job. I couldn't believe I was so irresponsible that I just left thinking you hated me for it. Then you told me about how fucked up you are mentally over it at the hospital and I felt even more ashamed. You should've been given better in life, and...I'm sorry I failed you. I'm the one that needs to be in the nut house not you!" Goku sobbed as he told the ugly truth.

A trail of tears formed on Gohan's cheeks as he rose from the chair and walked closer to his sobbing father. He stopped at the edge of the bed as he asked," Is that why you tried to kill yourself?"

Goku nodded in reply as he was too ashamed to look at his own son. But he was startled when he felt the bed sink in and Gohan wrapped his arms around his neck and placing his head on his chest. Goku looked down superized to see Gohan there, he really felt like he lost him for good. He tried to wrap his arms around him but failed due to how weak he was from his suicide attempt. Gohan saw this and helped him get into a more comfortable position.

"I don't hate you anymore dad. And I'm sorry too, for being so crule to you. We'll get you some help." Gohan whispered through tears as he gently kissed his cheek.

"You don't?"

Gohan shook his head,"No, I love you." He whispered.

"Why can't I move?" Goku asked.

"The Cardioflaxine you tried to over dose on caused some nerve damage that will go away in time. Your body ubsorbed a lot ove it before Aunt Jaz pumped your stomach. She told me as she came in here to check on you when I was watching you sleep. But it's okay I'll take care of you like I did mom when she was preganant and miscarried." Gohan explained.

"I bet she's real angry at me for using her heart meds to kill myself huh?"

"Yes, she was. She was so pissed she couldn't even see streght as she put it and she ordered a new perscription." Gohan replied.

Gohan got up to sit against the wall behind Goku's head and he pulled him up to where his head was on his chest. He stroked his hair and held him just like Sky use to do for him. Then Gohan's tail came up to wrap around Goku's bicep.

"Never ran away from anything I've dealt with for these past four years, so neither should you. Please don't run from this challenge to recover dad. Don't give up again." Gohan whispered to him.

"I won't, I promise. And I plan on keeping it. I love you Gohan." Goku whispered with a smile on his face as he closed his eyes and drifted back into a peaceful slumber.

Just then Gohan remembered the radio was still on and it was finishing the end of the perfect song for this moment.

**I promise you.**

**That I'll be there.**

**When your heart is filled with sorrow and dispair.**

**I'll carry you.**

**When you need a friend.**

**You'll find my foot prints in the sand.**

Gohan smiled as he let his eyes slide shut as he repeated the verse to Goku.

"I promise you, that I'll be there. When your heart is filled with sorrow and dispair. I'll carry you when you need a friend, You'll find my foot prints in the sand." Gohan softly sang as he too was claimed by peacful sleep.

**There how was that?**

**Thanks again to my reviewers. **

**But it isn't over yet! Just one more chapter.**

**The song verse I used came from the song "Foot prints in the sand" by Leona louis**

**Youtube it Schubskie!**

**See ya later :D**

**BTW Five of cups means regret.**


	18. Chapter 18

Reading of dispair

Chapter eighteen: Knight of swords

Disclaimer: I do not own DB, DBZ, or DBGT.

One week later

It was a bright sunny day at the Son house and not a single thing went wrong that day. The day was absolutly perfect. Chichi decided to have a cook out at the house for a little get together. Jasmine brought her grill and deep fryer over and got to work cookng all the food. She had to get there three hours earily to help Chichi cook all that food. It wasn't too superizing that Jasmine had to keep swatting or chasing the two saiyans away from the food she had already sitting out. She had everything wrapped and covered in tubba ware and on that heating table she also brought to keep the food from getting cold. Gohan was sitting at the kitchen table with Goku. They watched Chichi and Jasmine cook the best dishes and all their favoriates. Jasmine had even cook some food from here home country and a few others.

Jasmine was in a very giddy mood this morning for she had found the answer to all the questions in life she was seeking. She was a foster child in the US, but she found out what really happened to her real parents. Her parents Docovitch and Rauja were captured by the Mistresshood and hed as prisoners for their power. That had happened when she was born. The Mistresshood knew the secret of Jasmine's birth for she held a power that could defeat them and put an end to their evil empire. She was a rencarnated goddess. The Lycian goddess of war and distruction Lingera. She was dumped in the US as a means of disposal. But one week later she was called in to action yet again to end the war permanately for the Lycainese Empire found the Mistresshood's main base on planet Quake.

She defated the Mistresshood like the legend said she would and freed the prisoners. That was when she met her mother and father. Her father Docovitch Redback was a proud Russain lycian that served in the Red army, and her mother was a lycian sorceress from India. She was hindu and a pasifist. Jasmine found out her real name was Ishtar which to the lycians means heavenly warrior. She had informed everyone about them and invited them to the get togther. Gohan and Goku sat at the table catching up on the events of the last four years. Goku had recovered from his suicide attempt a week ago. However he was in a wheel chair temperarily because of all the nerological damage the drugs he used caused.

But all in all Gohan and Goku had made amends and decided to start over fresh. Goku got help and saw Rose Jets with Gohan on a weekly basis and going to physical therapy to regain the strengh in his body and help his nervous system recover. He did get one hell of a tougne lashing from Chichi and Jasmine for even attempting suicide and using Jasmine's Cardioflaxine to do it. But Everything simmered down and everyone was picking up the pieces. Gohan took care of him like he promised. He declined any help offered to do so.

Due to all the damage in Goku's nervous system he couldn't do much so Gohan had to help him. Gohan bathed him, fed him, dressed him, and sometimes helped him use the bathroom. Goku felt guilty as usual but Gohan squashed that guilt and told him he was keeping that promise. However Goku promised to take care of Gohan when he recovered. He learned how Gohan took his meds and saw all thie shit he dealt with for the past four years fighting cancer. Goku was proud his son was keeping himself together so well and they spent a lot of time together. Gohan took him everywhere even to the grave yard to visit Sky. He also told him of all the good times he and Sky had together.

He had to admit it was good having his father home again even if they did have their little fall out when he came back. Gohan would cry over her sometimes but Goku held him the best he could. But coming back to reality Gohan realized life was just too short and he was glad things took a turn for the better. He watched his mother and Jasmine cook and laugh about the good times as he released a content sigh. Everyone looked at them and simled, happy to finaly have the loving atmosphere return to the home. Gohan looked over at them with a questionable look.

"What?" Gohan asked.

"I'm just glad to see you happy again." Chichi stated with Jasmine agreeing.

"Yeah, well life's too short." Gohan replied softly smiling.

"That it is my friend, that it truely is." Jasmine agreed.

Gohan let a few tears of happiness fall from his eyes as he smiled at them, his family. He hurried and wiped them away feeling embarrassed about his moment of weekness.

"It's alright to shead some tears Gohan. It cleanses the soul." Jasmine replied as she walked over there to hug him.

"I know but I thought I'd cry myself dry already." Gohan replied.

"No one ever cries themselves dry anymore. I learned that four years ago." Jasmine whispered gently.

"The guest are here Jasmine let's get this food ready." Chichi noted.

"Alright, Why don't you go and have some alone time with Goku?" Jasmine asked Gohan.

"That's great. C'mon dad." Gohan said feeling his happiness come back to him.

"That sounds so good." Goku interjected.

Gohan rose from his chair and walked over to Goku. He grabbed the handles to the wheel chair and wheeled him outside. Once they came to the lake Gohan found a good spot to put the breaks on Goku's chair and sit down on the ground next to him. They gazed out into the distance and enjoyed the day.

"Dad? Would you ever feel whole again if mom died?"

"No, I wouldn't. You're thinking of Sky again aren't you?"

"Yes, I think about her a lot. And here's the thing, I felt like I had a connection with her. It wasn't about sex or dates. It was about, the love that we shared. A connection so strong that we would be sick if we weren't together in a while. A connection greater than just simply saying I love you. What I don't understand is, how can anyone in the whole world or the WHOLE universe for that matter give up such a beautiful thing I will never know. I don't think I'll love again." Gohan explained emotionally.

"Well, I think that way about your mother Gohan. And the truth is, I don't know how I lived without her for four years. I felt so ignorant for even trying to sever something like that. And well, I paid for it big time. I was so caught up in this planet that I didn't even take the time to enjoy what life is really about and I'm sorry for that. But you taught me how to love unconditionally and I juust wanted to say I'm very proud of you for that." Goku stated.

Gohan looked up at his father dumbstruck and finaly smiled the largest smile he had in a long long time. He got up and threw his arms around him.

"Thank you! Thank you so much!" He cried, his head burried into his shoulder.

"For what?" Goku asked confused.

"My whole life I've been waiting for you to be proud of me for something else other than fighting. I didn't think you cared about the rest of who I was. But, but you showed me that you really did! Thank you daddy!" Gohan cried.

Goku smiled and felt his heart warm as he reached over and pulled Gohan onto his lap. He held him as much as he could for as long as he could.

"I love you Gohan. Don't ever doubt that for a second. And as for the romance part in your life, just give it time. You'll heal eventually."

And so they sat by the lake just enjoying each other's company for life was too short to run or feel horrible all the time. For Son Gohan knew that life was indeed far too short for the tarot card reading in life known as the Reading of dispair.

**THE END**

**Well there you have it fokes! It has come to an end.**

**The knight of swords means end of a problem.**

**Thank you to all my readers and reviewers and you have given me so much inspiration throughout this piece and I just wanted to say you've given me the courage to write this.**

**A special thanks to Rayvenwolf for editing and to schubskie.**

**God bless!**


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